howl (howie) is my bestest friend and the sweetest, most perfect creature on this godforsaken rock, and he could really use the help and support of everyone and anyone.

i came home from fishing on 4/17 to my sweet boy looking very weak curled up in a ball on the floor. his breathing was very shallow, but rapid. he was making a lot of groaning noises. he was fine when i was home from work (before i left to go fishing) just a few hours prior, so this is something that came about very quickly and very suddenly. i immediately knew something was not right and took him to the emergency vet, where he was put on oxygen right away and treated for possible asthma with no improvement. an xray was performed, which revealed an enlarged heart and fluid around his lungs. my poor, sweet, beautiful baby was diagnosed with heart disease and congestive heart failure. the vet said that this was unfortunately common for male cats of his age and size (hes a huge cat. not fat by any means, just a massive, very muscular guy).

this news has absolutely destroyed me in ways that i never knew i could be, and i fear the worst. a minimum 24 hour stay at the hospital was crucial, so i agreed to it. he will remain on oxygen and will be starting diuretics to alleviate his fluid build-up. he requires a heart ultrasound and intensive medication therapy. he may even need to stay longer and other expensive testing depending on his progress in the next 24 hours.

i agreed to his care plan without any idea as to how i will afford it, as i only just recently got back on my feet after suffering my own recent health crisis and my emergency major surgery. i walked into that animal hospital with about $500 to spare hoping that theyd tell me i was crazy and that he was fine and normal and i was just overreacting. i applied for care credit and was approved for $2200, which was just enough to pay the deposit on his overall bill, whatever it may end up being, but im expecting something horrificly hefty and completely out of my means.

please, please help. i would do anything for my baby. even if all this does is buy me a few more months with him, i will find a way to make it happen. there is no prognosis yet, but i know itd be a lot more grim if i hadnt decided to seek this terribly expensive care. letting him suffer is simply not an option. he may have good odds at a normal life expectancy with medication and special care, but i cant know that without shelling out some major money.

for the love of god, anything, anything, ANYTHING helps. even if all you can manage is a simple share. i really dont know what to expect as far as how expensive this urgent care will be, so i've set the goal to $5k for now and will adjust as i learn new information. trust that every penny i have outside of rent/bills is going into this as well.

here are some fun facts about howie:

-his birthday is in 2 days (4/20). he will be 6 years old, and i have had him since he was 2, almost 3 months old.

-his favorite treat is a piece of deli meat turkey slice.

-he was born in a litter of gray tabbies with green eyes. he is the only siamese mix of his litter.

-he doesnt allow anyone to pick him up or hold him except for me.

-he sleeps in my arms almost every single night, and has done so his whole life.

-we used to have a ritual called "eggroll friday" where id come home from work every friday with an eggroll from quiktrip that he and i would share.

thank you for taking the time to read. please consider donating or sharing, or ideally both. i want nothing more than to be able to bring my baby home and hold him tight and give it my all on ensuring his health and longevity. this cannot be how and when i say good bye to the greatest thing that has ever happened to me.