Urgent Help Needed: One Last Bump in Allison's Road to Baby
Donation protected
Hi Friends,
It feels quite uncomfortable to be asking for help in this way, so if we could spin this into a 39th birthday present, that would be great. :-) I’ve always prided myself on being independent—I've built a thriving group practice, saved where I could, and made responsible decisions for myself and my future child. Now, I have one last step in what has been a very long four-year journey to health and motherhood; and in order to ensure a healthy pregnancy, it is a step I can only take with your urgent help.
First, for the sake of transparency, I want to share how I found myself on this "untraditional" path to motherhood:
- 2021: I was diagnosed with stage 3 endometriosis, which progressed to stage 4 within a couple of years. Since it was growing on my ovaries, I froze my eggs to preserve my fertility. This was a five-month process that cost $22,000.
- 2022 - July 2023: I thought I would have plenty of time to date, and was eager to do so after I ended a year-long relationship in April 2020 and was unable to date due to social distancing until late 2021. However, my endometriosis worsened and eventually led to recurrent urinary retention, which required a hospital stay and six ER visits costing $3,000. From October 2022 through my surgery recovery in September 2023, I was unable to work full-time due to my health. As luck would have it, during the five months of hospital and ER visits, I had $15,000 of unexpected home expenses: my fence had to be replaced, my sewer line had to be replaced, my kitchen line had to be replaced, and then the oak tree in the back died and had to be urgently removed so it wouldn’t fall on my house!
- August 2023, after almost a year without a solution to the endometriosis, I finally found a surgeon capable of handling my case. The surgery was incredibly successful, and the surgeon removed endometriosis from my uterine artery, ovaries (one endometrioma was the size of a lime and the ovary had to be completely reconstructed), ureters, bladder, rectovaginal wall, uterosacral ligament, and hypogastric nerve. Miraculously, my uterus was perfect minus a few small polyps. Because insurance does not cover surgeon fees for excision surgery, which is the gold standard for endometriosis treatment, my surgery was over $6,000.
The surgery was a huge success, and I owe it all to Dr. Haverland at Endometriosis Center of Excellence in Dallas! Because of her, I had my life back and better than ever. I was back at work full-time and returned to all the things I love. In regard to fertility, Dr. Haverland and my retired REI Dr. Zarutskie (who froze my eggs), said I didn’t have time to wait for “Mr. Right” anymore, and that it was time to find “Mr. Donor!” They recommended me creating embryos with donor sperm and doing an embryo transfer by August 2024, as embryo transfers are most successful 3-12 months after endometriosis excision surgery. Yet, as luck would have it, as far as transfer went, there were many delays at the end of 2023 and in 2024:
- A saline sonohystogram came back abnormal. Because of this, I had a hysteroscopy during which uterine polyps were found and removed ($2,000). These polyps grew in just 6 months.
- A search for an ethical sperm bank endorsed by donor conceived children that took longer than planned ($2,540)
- A need for additional genetic carrier screening.
- An issue at my fertility clinic that created a delay
- A scary mammogram that VERY THANKFULLY ended up being a false alarm
With all of that out of the way, in October 2024, I finally made my embryos and had them PGT-A tested ($7,500). Since we were approaching the holidays, I wanted to wait until after the first of the year to do the embryo transfer so that I could ensure that my doctor would be the one to do the transfer. My doctor advised that I go back on the pill to prevent uterine polyp and endometriosis growth. Since I had been on norethindrone for 8 months that year and had to stop it due to severe side effects, including blood sugar fluctuations that caused a low blood sugar of 20, I was prescribed an estrogen/progestin combination pill. Unfortunately, this method of hormonal suppression gave me an ovarian cyst, which led to another ER visit in December 2024.
After the cyst luckily ruptured on its own, my doctor said, “Allison, I don’t think we should wait any longer. Because of the cyst, we need to make sure nothing is growing in your uterus and do another hysteroscopy; and then we need to do your transfer immediately after that." The hysteroscopy in late January was all clear, and I was so excited to do the transfer in April knowing my uterus would be a great "first home" for baby, BUT THEN…
Just as I was beginning to financially recover from the medical debt and financial impact of my endometriosis ($60,000+ total), I discovered that the accountant I had hired for bookkeeping and tax preparation made errors that my current accountant and another CPA called “egregious,” “negligent,” and “reportable.” Between the money I paid the old accountant, the money I’m having to pay the new accountant to fix it all, and the penalties and fees that were accrued due to my old accountant's "negligence," this old accountant has cost me $20,000 total. Though my CPA, my CPA friend, and believe I have recourse, the issues the old accountant caused will certainly not be resolved in time to have the money necessary to do the embryo transfer in April- which is what I need to do to maximize my chances of my baby coming into this world.
I am already outside the highest recommended deadline of August 2024, and now, due to my history of polyps and endometriosis, I will miss the opportunity to implant my embryo into a healthy uterus without your help. I would hate to have survived all that I have in my against-all-odds journey to motherhood only for this current "bump in the road" to wreck my dream.
My immediate goal is to raise $6,500 for the transfer cycle happening in April. In reality, between fertility treatments, medical bills, and the financial strain from treatment delays caused by substandard care, the financial burden is much bigger. So, I’ve set the goal at $10,000 to reflect the minimum amount that would allow me to move forward.
Asking for financial assistance is the last thing I'd ever wanted to do, but now that this little potential for life is on the line, it’s not just about me anymore. If you’re able to contribute, I would be beyond grateful. If not, even sharing this means the world to me.
Thank you for reading and for helping me bring my child to life.
Organizer
Allison Marek
Organizer
Houston, TX