My name is Jessica Gray, and I never imagined I’d be making a GoFundMe for myself. I’m usually the one helping everyone else.

For the last five months, I have been in a healthcare nightmare with issues ranging from a poisonous gallbladder to serious life-threatening bleeding related to a need for a hysterectomy. It’s limited my ability to work and put an extreme demand on my finances. My health insurance premium became too high to pay, and my income history for the last year, minus the last few months, has made state and federal assistance unattainable. Hospital bills exceed $10,000, but I can deal with those later.

The threat to my life is not being able to obtain surgery outside of an emergency setting, which would basically be when I’m dying. A uterine cyst ruptured two weeks ago, and besides being in the worst pain I have ever experienced, I was very close to bleeding out. It slowed before they considered it necessary to perform emergency surgery, but the bleeding continues, and I am growing weaker and less capable of doing my job by the day. Even ultrasound and diagnostic appointments are out of my financial reach. The doctor’s appointments I can afford only produce referrals I cannot pay for.

The low end of what I have to pay upfront to receive any care outside of waiting until I am near death for a response to my situation in a hospital is $6,700 with insurance I cannot afford any longer (monthly payment is over $600) just to get well enough to be able to support myself. I’m terrified, and it isn’t getting much better. It’s shameful to need help when I am the helper. I’m sick to my stomach writing this, but I don’t see any other way out. I’m begging for help.

For me. For the animals in my care as the owner of a horse and livestock rescue, and for those who count on me for help. Anything is appreciated. This nightmare needs to end so that I can go back to being an asset and not a liability to those I love and those who need me. I’m slowly losing hope, energy, and vitality as this continues. It’s absurd to me that this is the best medical care available in America. I’ve considered and researched going to Mexico for a hysterectomy just to end the ordeal.

Please consider a small donation to get me in a position to have much-needed surgery. I’ll deal with the emergency bills and piled-up medical debt when I can get back to work like I’m used to.