UPDATE: Bring Back Rebecca & Ben

Update:

Hello, My name is Ari, Rebecca’s sister. This situation has become an entire nightmare as Israel declared a state of war. My mother went down to Israel in hopes of helping my sister move into an apartment, in which she was able to buy them. Not even two days after my mother’s arrivals, the horrific war began. They have not even seen each other and will not for who knows how long. This is the scariest time of our lives and we need as much assistance as possible. They are now stuck in Israel. Rebecca and Ben cannot leave still due to legal issues as the father refuses to let them flee the country in turmoil. The child, in the event the court says yes, will need a travel bond of 125k. All the money raised will go directly towards that. We clearly do not have this money whatsoever. With this unexpected situation, the expenses that were once manageable on our own, have become unimaginable. This has become a huge financial burden on all of us. We are asking for any help possible. We would accept any donations, air miles, or even just prayers. Please keep them in your thoughts and pray for their safety at all times.

Thank you,

Ari

Hello, my name is Rebecca Perlman, and I am pleading for help. I am in Israel with my three-month-old son, Ben. I am an American citizen and my home is in Connecticut. I am being held here against my will and all I want is to come home with my child to my family and friends, whom I miss very much. I am scared, lonely, and feel extremely isolated. I am a nursing mother, and all my time is dedicated to my son. I am not free to leave the country, as my ex-boyfriend is prohibiting me from traveling back home with my child. He demands the child remain in Israel until the age of 18, with or without me, his mother. (In Israel, the culture and legal system is very complex) I feel like this is a bad dream and I'll wake up and everything will be fine. But it’s not. I am pleading with everyone, please help me escape from this nightmare. I have a long legal battle ahead of me. I have no money and I am unable to work. I am very scared for myself and my child. Please help us. All I want is to provide a healthy and loving home, where my son and I will thrive with the help of our family and friends. He will be surrounded by grandparents, sisters, aunts, uncles, and friends that love us unconditionally. We want peace in our life. How did I get here? This is my story;

I wasn’t sure what I wanted to get into when High School was over. I decided to take an educational trip to Israel, offered by Birthright Israel. This led to my decision to serve two years in the Israeli military. The culture was much more difficult to adapt to than I anticipated, but I was nonetheless appreciative of the experience and opportunity I was given. I was happy to return home to my home in Connecticut with my family and friends.

Covid arrived and my education goals were put on hold temporarily, but I knew I wanted to pursue a career in health services. Once Covid ended, my family was struck with a series of tragic events. My uncle was killed in a hit-and-run, and my aunt was deteriorating rapidly, due to her Alzheimer’s and major health complications. This was a lot for my family and me to handle. Covid had already been a major stressor in our lives and this put me in a dark place. I decided to take a brief trip to Israel to unwind. I was eager to continue my studies so I enrolled in an EMT course and found a job to support myself as an assistant manager in a restaurant. I managed to finish my EMT program, with the intention of using this certification back home. During this time I endured a serious work injury, leaving me out of commission for a few months, which put me in serious debt. At this point, I knew I needed to come back home, however, I lacked the resources to do so.

After a very tough year, I finally saw a glimpse of hope. I met who I thought to be the love of my life. He was someone I knew back from the military and we became romantically involved. This resulted in my pregnancy after only two months of dating. The relationship developed and there were many red flags that I tried to move past for the sake of my child. Slowly, the situation became very unsafe for me and my pregnancy. There were many times I wanted to fly back home to have the baby and also to be with my family. At that point, my aunt was steadily deteriorating. Horrifyingly, I was denied the right to leave. My ex made it clear to me that if I were to leave Israel, he would forget me and the baby and would consider himself to be a “sperm donor”. He made me feel cheap and worthless. He pressured me multiple times to have an abortion, which I refused. Alongside the verbal abuse and manipulation, due to lack of funds, I was moved with him into his parents’ home. This was also a bad situation, as they would not accept me or my child, because we were not Jewish according to the rabbinical court standard. I was living a life of shame, isolation, and fear. No one would talk to me until I did what I was told and converted to Judaism. As I plead to leave, I was given yet another ultimatum by my ex. Not only did he PHYSICALLY prevent me from leaving, but also told me if I wanted to leave the house that I would have nowhere to come back to. I would be stranded in a foreign country. I was four months pregnant with nowhere to escape. I have no family in Israel and my ex made me cut ties with the friends that I had made. I was petrified and very lonely. He would always check my phone and texts, as well as follow my every move. The only people I was allowed to have a connection with were the people in his circle.

After feeling unwelcomed by his family, he moved us to a secluded area far from everyone and everything. I felt even more alone than when I was shunned by his family in their home. My ex manipulated me into believing we would fly back to the USA, have the baby, and relocate to Connecticut where I would have a strong and healthy support system. Additionally, this plan would include job opportunities for both of us. I was blind enough to believe him, as he had even stated that he refused a job offer in Israel because we were moving to the States. Against my wishes, this never happened.

My son was born on March 9th, 2023 in Israel. He made me hopeful that everything would be okay. All I knew at this point was that I had to protect my son, no matter what it takes. Even after my emergency c-section, I immersed myself immediately and fully into taking care of Ben 24/7. This included breastfeeding, doctors’ appointments, lactation consultations, etc. I did everything to keep my son healthy and happy. While I was committed to the care and responsibilities of child-rearing, my ex made it clear he wasn’t interested in becoming a father to our son. He continued his irresponsible habits, drug use, and displays of out-of-control anger, which were really scary. This was not at all a good environment to raise my son in. I felt very unsafe and feared for me and my son. I knew I had to end this toxic relationship. My son and I were able to escape temporarily to a safer location. My ex hated that he was no longer in control and proceeded to take legal action. He is trying to keep my son, Ben, from his right to an American passport and citizenship, despite his being entitled to it. The papers he served me state that I cannot leave the country with my son until he turns 18. I have 30 days to respond with my own attorney. If I don’t, I will be facing this terrifying reality, one where I will be a prisoner in this country. I refuse to let my child live a life of uncertainty, poverty, manipulation, and abuse.

I humbly ask that you help us in any way possible. I have many legal fees to pay and nowhere to live with my newborn. Please help us get out of this situation and gain our freedom back. We want to come home. Please help.

Humbly and respectfully,

Rebecca Perlman