Hi there, my name is Joe and I'm raising funds to pay for my gender affirming surgery in early 2026.

My story is not the typical trans-realisation story that you would usually see. For the majority of my life I've lived as a gay man. I never really felt attached to my genitals but for me that wasn't really a big thing, nor where I got pleasure from. I've also thankfully never been held to specific gender roles or ideologies and I very much just did my own thing. Whether it was powerlifting, knitting, silk painting or just exploring things I enjoyed - I never felt like I had to do or act in a certain way and thankfully was never made to feel anything was specifically gendered.

Over the last 6 years, and the last 2 more intensely, I began to explore a side of myself I hadn't realised was there. I realised that there was more to a lack of a connection to my genitals and began looking at "genital dysphoria" and surgical options. Through therapy, I realised that I had never once had to question my own gender (I'm just me), and on looking inwards realised that I wouldn't even consider myself "male", nor would I know what that is meant to feel like.

More therapy, some sleepless nights (and tears) later, I landed on non-binary: agender; specifically not identifying with any gender and finding the concept of gender irrelevant to me. A year into therapy and I've now seen a surgeon for vaginoplasty and am hoping to have this in early 2026 (date TBC).

NHS pathways for trans, non-binary and gender non-conforming people are long (in my case, it's currently at 6 years to see a clinician for the first time). I've been thankful that I could afford to pay for much of the therapy privately... however surgery is expensive. Due to some physiological issues, the technique I'm looking to have is also likely to be the most expensive one (peritoneal pull-through) and I've been doing random jobs in bars, bootblacking for tips and just generally saving where I can to fund this.

I'm not expecting to hit my target as times are tough for everyone, but any money I do receive will mean that it's a bit less debt that I will need to take on myself.

Knowing how much this surgery can help people, I am also vowing to give a proportion of my future bootblacking tips to those in similar situations. I do not know how I'll do this just yet, but I would very much like to pay kindness forward and help others.

Thank you for reading my story, and thank you for anything you can donate to help me reach my goal!