Ukrainian Family Needs Help

Several months ago, I hired a man to do a few odd jobs for me. Upon meeting him in person, I realized he spoke no English so we communicated via Google Translate. I hired him again for another task and started asking him questions about himself. I learned that shortly after the war in Ukraine broke out, they made the difficult decision to leave Ukraine and come to America.

Maksim, Sofia and their 13-year-old daughter Mila were living in basements for almost three weeks of constant exposure to bombing. They then went to stay with a relative in another town only to have fighting break out there. For the sake of their daughter, they made the very difficult decision to leave and came to the USA on an open Visa. At the age of 62 when most American citizens are contemplating retirement, Maksim found himself and his family having to start their lives over. He is a proud person who asks for nothing and said to me “We work, we study and we hope to rise.” Despite all that has happened he feels fortunate to be here. Many of his friends are in the same situation or worse…fighting in the war as men in their 50s and 60’s.

One of the things that surprised me was that I realized Maksim was almost my age! He has left everything he has ever known behind and has been starting completely over with no help. I think that was what resonated with me and why I decided to try and help him and his family. At one point after I had gotten to know him a little more he told me “Before the war a little more than a year ago, I could not imagine that the solution to the material/financial problem would again be the most important thing in my life. In Ukraine, we were not rich, but we had everything we needed. The situation in Ukraine seems to get worse every day and so it is hard to see a situation where we will be able to return to Ukraine any time soon. I have a daughter to raise and educate still….”

Seeing through the eyes of recent immigrants who do not speak the language has been an eye-opening experience for me personally. Because they came so early after the war broke out, they did not and still do not qualify for the federally sponsored program United for Ukraine. In Ukraine, Sofia worked as a nurse and then as a lab technician which she truly enjoyed. Maksim has a degree of Doctor of Philosophy and Candidate of Technical Sciences. Maksim oversaw the dams and locks in the canals and rivers of Kyiv. Since they have been in the USA, they are reduced to doing any and every kind of manual labor to feed their family. Maksim works two days a week in an eyeglass factory and does handyman and yard work every other day he can. Most weeks, he works 7 days a week. Sofia helps him many days doing hard physical jobs and works in a Russian nursing home for practically minimum wage. Not very many men his age are physically working 8, 10, sometimes 12 hours a day. Luckily, he is very skilled at working with his hands. They have encountered landlords who take advantage of them but are afraid to do anything for fear of reprisal and not wanting to do anything that would jeopardize their situation.

Their daughter Mila is an impressive soft spoken mature teenager. At the age of 13, she left her home and all her friends behind. As if being a teenage girl isn’t challenging enough, she finds herself in many situations having to translate and be the spokesperson for her family because she speaks and understands English. She has explicitly requested her image be deleted as she does not wish for any publicity and worries about how she might be perceived by her new classmates.

Despite struggling to survive each day, I was deeply touched and honored when they invited me to their apt and treated me to a delicious traditional Ukrainian meal. During that meal, Maksim sang a Ukrainian folk song for me and it was an incredibly emotional and humbling experience to see how much he loves and misses his homeland.

As I got to know Maksim, I learned he had a grown daughter Olena and two beautiful grandchildren ages 9 and 11 who were all alone in Spain with no support network or help. In addition to being a Mom, Olena was working three jobs to survive.

Although Maksim and I do not speak the same language, there is the universal shared experience of being a parent. It was so obvious how worried and scared he is for his daughter and grandchildren. Every time I see Maksim and ask him what would be helpful, he always politely declines or says he is fine. He is a very proud person who asks for nothing and expects nothing. It is only until I keep gently prodding that he tells me what is on his mind. Then one day for the first time he asked me for something. He asked if I would help Olena and her children come here through the United for Ukraine program. I am happy to say that Olena and her children arrived in Boston on July 21st. They are all incredibly and beyond excited to be reunited. Of course, that brings more stress and responsibility for all of them, finding housing, jobs, transportation, etc for Olena and the children.

As I am finding out, the biggest problem they face is finding housing which is why I am trying to raise such a substantial amount…

At present, Maksim, Sofia, and Mila live in a 1 bedroom apt. Although it is against the law to discriminate against immigrants, it’s easy for landlords to figure out ways around it. Many of the transactions and processes we take for granted are much more complicated for them because of their status. The cost of living in MA is very high so you can imagine how challenging it is to find housing, affordable transportation, etc.

The primary purpose of these monies is to provide support for housing, transportation and medical expenses. Although the proposed amount might seem like a lot of money (which it is), the need is very real and will hopefully allow them to get into a better overall financial situation and if we are lucky, relieve just a little bit of stress and allow them to breath for the first time since they came to America over a year ago.

When I told Maksim my plan to fundraise, he initially did not want me to do it because he does not want sympathy or pity. I have convinced him that this is a time in his life when it is OK to let others help him. He is very suspicious about the whole process and wonders why people would help. In truth, I think he was suspicious of me at the beginning and could not figure out why I was trying to help him. He wonders why people won’t just think this is just a big scam. I hope you will help me show him what America is made of and what we are all about.

Please send this to your friends and family…. Perhaps they are immigrants or refugees or children of recent immigrants or refugees.

Please know that anything you can give regardless of the amount is tremendously appreciated and will make a real difference.

People in Ukraine live in fear for their lives and sadly many innocent people lose their lives and their homes every day. Over 500,00 people have lost their lives on both sides of the conflict. Regardless of the size of your donation, I will make sure your money is put to good use. If you would rather save the fee for Go Fund Me. It will only be used for Housing, Transportation and Medical Expenses.

Thank you for considering this very worthy cause. Please note I have used different names for the family members at their request.

If you are concerned for any reason that this is a scam, please reach out and I promise to respond to allay any fears you may have.

With deepest appreciation,

Marc Shapiro