Warrior Mama Rebuilding

In January of 2018, my beautiful friend TJ was the victim of a domestic battery incident that resulted in the removal of one of her front teeth and some bones in her face.   She has endured a series of reconstructive surgeries in the process to implant a permanent tooth to replace the one that was lost.

Not only has each of these surgeries been deeply traumatic for her, but her ex has failed to pay for any of it despite court orders, leaving her stranded with multiple medical bills on top of the burden of caring for their children.   She was forced to open a credit account in order to pay for her reconstructive surgeries.  He has since lost his job, so she is covering most expenses on her own including the cost of childcare for their two children which comes to $1,710 a month.  The next surgery will cost $6,000 and she simply does not have this money.  Without this last surgery, TJ is experiencing severe night sweats and TMJ symptoms.  She is in significant discomfort which only this surgery will fix.

While still married, they had moved to Florida to pursue a job change for her husband, but she moved home with their kids after this happened and has been able to successfully reestablish her private psychotherapy practice.   When her ex husband lost his job, she started another business venture, a pottery studio, in order to supplement her income.  Despite all of her efforts, the financial responsibility of caring for their two children, her teenage daughter and these medical bills is too much to cover and she is drowning in her debts that never should have occurred in the first place.

To add insult to injury, TJ's car which she uses to transport their girls, was repossessed yesterday including their carseats, as her ex who was court ordered to make payments stopped doing so.  Apparently he was aware this might happen, but didn't bother to give her a head's up, so she needs to acquire a vehicle ASAP in order to get her girls to school and get to work herself.

Over the the past month, her credit has been wrecked by his negligence, so seeking help in the form of credit is out of the question. His court-ordered  obligations are to pay a loan they incurred together ($414/ month) and the CareCredit (medical/ dental) card she opened to pay for the reconstruction of her mouth (~$450/ month) as well as the vehicle.  He’s several months behind, and she simply can’t afford to catch up. 

She has every intention to hold her ex accountable, but the last surgery is a pressing issue that needs tended to as soon as possible.  The car is a recent crisis that also needs tending to immediately. 

I can tell you first-hand that TJ would do this for anybody else.  She is a selfless human being who consistently puts other people first.  She is a wonderful mama and a dear friend.  Through this whole ordeal, she has continued to responsibly parent her girls; heck, she has even brought my kid home from school a couple of times, despite all of this trauma.  She is a wonderful human, and she deserves a little help during this traumatic time.  She intends to use any extra that might come to pay it forward in meaningful ways for others. 

If you are able to, even the smallest amount will help her pull out of her debts and get back on track to keeping herself and her family out of harm's way.