I had the wonderful honor of being Tyler’s private tutor when he was referred to me shortly after he moved to the Camas area as a freshman in February 2020–-just weeks before the pandemic.
Most of my 18-year tenure as a teacher has been working with teenagers who are considered troubled/at-risk, so I can understand and empathize with the many struggles they face. Unfortunately, the pandemic has caused much isolation among our students with online schooling; therefore, affecting their overall social emotional learning and mental health.
Children, especially—are innately wired to socialize and desire frequent human connection; they need structure and stability during this critical time to thrive and fulfill their sense of worth and belonging. I would often be torn as Tyler’s tutor because I knew he had “class work” to complete during our limited sessions where he needed my guidance; however, he really just needed to be a “kid,” wanting to be heard and respected like a normal person. If I had a choice and could have changed one thing about my time with Tyler, I wish I could have had more of an opportunity to discuss his concerns and outlook on the world. I wish that our children could be back in school and interacting with peers, and feel helpless that this reality is beyond my control.
My family and I always enjoyed welcoming Tyler in our home, where we discussed his passions and interests. We all loved him, including our three dogs. Tyler was very articulate and would amaze us with his knowledge about politics, forestry, science, reptiles, bugs; sharing his love for all animals in general. He would challenge me on our differing views on politics and religion, yet was always very respectful, providing convincing explanations to his reasoning. Tyler also knew how to connect with my special needs adopted son, who immediately became intrigued by Tyler when he brought over his hedgehog, “Finley.” Tyler’s love for the small things in life has taught us so much, which will continue to help us grow, personally.
Reflecting on the short time I have come to know Tyler, I believe that our Lord placed him in our lives—not by coincidence, but for a reason; to teach us all a valuable lesson to find beauty and take joy in the small things in life, as well as to stand up for what you believe in.
Tyler’s mother and stepfather, Michelle and Mark Stickley, have been very involved and supportive from the very beginning. They went above and beyond to utilize resources to provide Tyler a loving, nurturing environment as he transitioned to his new home and school in Camas. Tyler loved them immensely—along with his older sister, Samantha (a pastry chef), and brother, Gabriel (7th grader), his dogs, Mia, Olive, and Norman; and hedgehog, Finley.
Tyler is also survived by his father and stepmother, Christian and Shelly Schmidt, from Monterey Bay, California, whom he lived with for five years prior to moving to Camas. There, Tyler developed his love of science, the forest, ocean, animals, and caring for reptiles was a shared hobby with his father. Tyler’s passion for current events was started by his grandparents, aunts, and uncles; and interests in arts, crafts, and Asian culture were inspired by his stepmother. Tyler enjoyed trying new foods, making memories with many friends, and grew up listening to world travels of his extended family. This is every parent’s worst nightmare, and we share in their heartache as they mourn Tyler’s loss.
Though we are deeply saddened by his tragic loss, we have faith that Tyler’s legacy will create a positive impact in our community by creating a memorial at his school and offering several scholarships based on his interests to deserving students in his honor.
Many of our youth are hurting during this challenging time, so please take the time to listen to and validate their feelings. Hug your children extra hard and love them more than ever. They have voices which long to heard, and have more to teach us about life than we realize.
On behalf of Tyler’s family and his school community, we appreciate your thoughts and prayers for strength during this time of loss.
God bless you all this holiday season, and thank you for your donations in memory of our beloved Tyler. They will help to pay for memorial expenses in his honor, and providing several scholarships to high school students, respectively.
R.I.P Sweet Tyler
June 15, 2005 - December 16, 2020