PLEASE HELP US REPLACE OUR CAR

SHORT VERSION: We took Doug’s [very small, very old, very used] car to be inspected, and were told kindly that the cost to inspect it is more than the car is worth.

Which is less we owe on it.

So we really really need to buy a car. Something safe to buckle our kids into that will run reliably for at least a year, is all we care about. Something we can pay cash for—so it’s cheap and so we don’t have to worry about payments.

LONG VERSION:

 I went with “HELP US WITH A CAR” because that’s the most immediate, most pressing need, the one I can’t figure out a work-around for.

But it’s actually hard to know how to categorize the kind of help we need. I could have also titled this “PRESCRIPTION MEDICATIONS” or “MEDICAL BILLS,” thanks to the surgeries we've both had, and the illnesses the kids' insurance didn't entirely cover. 

I could have titled it, “STILL RECOVERING FROM PAY DECREASE...AND JOB LOSS…AND THE OTHER JOB LOSS...AND THE OTHER PAY DECREASE” thanks to Leslie's job at Merrill Lynch transforming to a lower-paying job at Bank of America...and then a layoff from Bank of America...and then Doug's surgical injury making him unable to work at his mechanic position...and the ten-thousand-dollars-less job he took to replace that position. 

I could have titled it, "ALL THREE OF OUR SONS HAVE AUTISM."

I could have titled it, “CASHED IN ALL OUR SAVINGS TO SUPPORT ADULT CHILDREN THROUGH HEALTH CRISES.”

Or “BABYSITTING COSTS OUR ENTIRE SECOND PAYCHECK,”

or, “WE JUST PAID RENT, SECURITY, AND MOVING EXPENSES, AND NOW OUR LANDLORD IS TRYING TO EVICT US OVER OUR KID’S DISABILITY.”

I could have titled this “SERIOUSLY, IT’S EVERYTHING.  WE NEED HELP WITH ALL THE THINGS!!!”

We are hard-working people, and have always been able to get back to jobs. Doug's a veteran, and has continued his education throughout his working life--he got his last technical certification a couple of months before losing use of his hand, making all his tech certification useless. Leslie's a college graduate and has worked as many as three jobs at a time to support the kids. But our income has dropped dramatically, more than once, while our family grew and prices went up. We have tightened our belts and we have made do without things and experiences. We have cashed in ALL of our savings—no 401Ks, no savings accounts, nothing left. We have  started to sell what we can, which is ironically funny, as almost everything we own was secondhand when we got it, so it’s not worth much.

We moved into a cheaper house the very soonest we could, when our adult children were finally able to move out. Leslie got a job working from almost entirely from home, to eliminate child care from our budget.

But now Doug will be driving our only car for his 45-minute-each way commute, Leslie’s job  requires use of a car when she does work outside the house.

And our landlord is trying to evict us from our great new cheaper house. We’re confident that he won’t succeed, since he is entirely in the wrong…but we also know that will never be able to count on his good will if we’re ever a day late with the rent. Or a week. Or several weeks. Which has happened to us plenty of times.

We need to get stable, take a deep breath, and keep going. We're really good at "Keep Going." But the ground has been slipping out from under our feet faster than we can keep up, and we are about to run out of Keep Going.