First, please let me start by saying that one of my major character defects is the absolute aversion to asking others for help (a condition alternatively known as \"I have to control everything and I prefer to do everything for myself\" :-) ). Now, when this defect concerns matters of a financial nature, you can just FORGET about me asking someone for money! Granted, I take great joy in giving it away to others in need and yet I feel people will judge me as a horribly irresponsible and greedy person if I ask for it. Anyhoo...I have to get over all that and (wo)man-up. I\'m a 32-year-old housewife with a husband, 2 toddlers, a business, an active social and spiritual life, a recovering alcoholic....and I was just diagnosed with brain cancer last week.
I just found out tonight (ironically through the neurosurgery \"Welcome Packet\" I received in the mail and NOT from the mouth of a live person) that the biopsy I\'m having on Friday isn\'t really like a \"biopsy\" at all and a lot more like brain surgery! In my \"I can do everything world\", I had planned to have the biopsy Friday, recover Saturday and have Bible study at my house that night, take a quickie trip to the mountains with Kevin for a long weekend, fly to the beach Tuesday for a week of relaxation with my family and then come back for my follow-up to get my biopsy results and start treatment on Monday. We had already come to the conclusion that we were going to have to hire a nanny (on our single income) but I thought we had several weeks before I would really need anything. I also thought I had several more weeks of the go-getter me to organize my life, house, return emails and tie a lovely raffia bow neatly around the whole thing! Turns out, I can\'t drive or be alone with my kids for at least a month, no lifting, exercise, exertion, straining, sex or work of any kind for a minimum of 6 weeks!!! I\'m at an increased risk for seizures, hemorrhage and meningitis so it just might be ill-advised to be 6 hours away from the hospital on VACATION! The reality of my situation has arrived!
Not only did I not have the time for this, we certainly don\'t have the money! We were actually scheduled to put our house on the market THIS WEEKEND so we could keep working toward our financial goals by getting a smaller mortgage. Getting the cancer diagnosis last week takes moving off the table for now. In addition, we had faithfully paid off all of our credit cards and then this month, a fallen tree caused damage to Kevin\'s car which we repaired, my entire transmission had to be replaced ($4K), we had to pay for a rental car while it was fixed, Kevin\'s car got broken into at the rental place and that same day we discovered he needed all new tires. We were just told Saturday that our A/C needs to be replaced (with a lovely $10K price tag) and well, you get the idea......
Ok, take a pause from reading and SMILE! This is sounding tragic, even to me, and I do not intend it to be that way. Let\'s get back to the good stuff....G O D and His miracles. The way I see it, God owns all the money in the world so He is just going to send a lot of it our way. I think the recent hailstorm of financial burden was just a test to see if we would lose faith in God\'s promise for provision.......um, I believe we passed!!!!!
Even more so than I, Kevin would never ask for money. He is, of course, a wonderful provider for this family and I want everyone to know this is totally my idea. He keeps saying \"Even if we have to file bankruptcy or you are sick for a long time, there is only one outcome here I am not OK with....so as long as we come out on the other side of this as a family of 4, I don\'t care what else happens to us.\"
(You\'re tearing up, right? I definitely married a good one!) Anyway, he expressed some reservations about this whole thing but this is my only way to actively try (other than prayer) to ease the financial burdens he must be feeling. After reading all this, if you feel lead to donate then know that we humbly accept your gracious offering. Remember that every penny adds up so no amount is ever unappreciated!
Here is what your money will be used for.....Medical Expenses, Medication Costs, ChildCare, Transportation and basic household needs like groceries. Here is what your money WIL NOT EVER be used for........our vacations, clothing, vanity and luxury items. We will keep all the money in a seperate account that we use to pay bills. (Just want to be clear so if I post something about getting a massage or a new outfit or, heaven forbid botox-just sayin\', if I\'m going to be bald I at least want to get rid of my \"elevens\" between my eyebrows-, you don\'t feel like your donation money was used friviliously).
If it\'s not on your heart or in your bank account to give at this time, then don't sweat it! Monetary donation is just one of the MANY ways we NEED your help! Our most vital need is prayer-for healing, wisdom for my healthcare team, comfort and security for our boys, provision, peace, joy, patience, rest (this is a toughie for me-I literally loathe sitting still!) love & kindness toward one another, steadfast faith & physical help in the form of meals, babysitting, driving!
Ways to Stay In the Know:
1. I have created an online community where we will post updates and photos. You can post comments on the message board and sign up to bring a meal, babysit, run errands or cart my non-drivin' fanny around town! Go to: https://nhc.lotsahelpinghands.com/c/642388 . Fill out the right-hand side of the form which is a Request to Join the Community. Once you\'ve done this, a coordinator will approve you and you will be automatically added to the community and sent instructions for setting a password and signing-in.
2. You can also find me on Facebook under Tonya Dearman Breen.
Thanks for visiting the site and we will be praying that God blesses you, too!!!!
Sincerely, Tonya, Kevin, Conlin & Nolen Breen