To keep her family near Ashley as she heals

Aloha to all of you who will consider giving to this amazing family. I have held them close to my heart ever since I met Ashley and her mother LeAnn when I moved to Kona over 20 years ago. At that time LeAnn was a recently divorced mom raising her young, bright, and beautiful firstborn. Ashley had her nose in a book most times and LeAnn was a determined mom, making sure Ashley had all opportunities to shine. Ashley grew up to be a strong and independent young woman who was making her way in life when this tragedy occurred. This, from Ashley’s stepfather Eddie and her mother LeAnn, is Ashley’s story to date…

“On October 29th, 2021, at 5:40am, our 26-year-old daughter Ashley Alani-DeMello was involved in a single car accident and was ejected from her vehicle, resulting in trauma to her head, ribs, back, spleen and kidneys.

Ashley was found unresponsive at the scene of the accident and transported to North Hawai’i Community Hospital. The ER doctor determined that Ashley would need to be medevacked to Queenʻs Hospital on Oʻahu where they could properly care for Ashley’s extreme brain trauma, internal bleeding, and her broken ribs and fractured spine.

We were told to fly to Oahu as soon as possible to be with Ashley. Upon arrival at Queenʻs Medical Center, we were informed that Ashley had tested positive for COVID although she had tested negative when she was admitted to North Hawaiʻi Community Hospital. Her doctors at Queen’s said that although Ashley didn’t have COVID symptoms, they were required to treat her as if she was positive. We were told at that time that no one would be allowed in-room visitations, not even Ashley’s father Alfred who had flown in from Colorado.

A team of neurologists decided that Ashley should be placed on pentobarbital, a medication used to place patients into a medically induced coma. The goal was to allow her brain to rest in hopes that the swelling and bleeding in her brain would subside.

We took Ashley’s first week at Queen’s ‘minute-by-minute’ because her doctors were unsure whether Ashley would survive those first critical days following her accident. We took her second and third weeks ‘day-by-day’ while Ashley’s chances for survival still hung in the balance.

While in ICU Ashley had an ICP bolt placed in her head to monitor brain pressure and swelling. During the second week Ashley’s brain pressure started to slowly decrease but with some scary spikes along the way. She became stable enough, though, that her doctors called for a family meeting to discuss Ashley’s path forward. We, along with Ashley’s father Alfred, have decided that if Ashley has fought for this long and God has allowed her to keep fighting, we should be willing to do the same.

We gave consent for the next two surgeries which will help clear the way for long-term healing. The first surgery was to remove pieces of T8 and T9 vertebrae fractures and took place (successfully) a couple of days before Thanksgiving. Her second surgery on Thanksgiving Day was to put in a tracheotomy tube to replace the ventilator (which Ashley no longer needs) and she will have a direct feeding tube put in place as soon as necessary. As we are encouraged by these small victories, we have gotten used to moving backwards at times. Ashley is currently battling pneumonia and her doctors are monitoring her for any additional infections but we continue to trust her medical team and are hopeful that she will overcome this latest setback.

Ashley now needs time to heal. Her doctors told us at the family meeting that moving forward would mean a wait-and-see recovery window of at least 6 months and up to one year. We have committed to this and now we are looking to the long term. We have faith that this is the right path for our family and thank everyone for holding us in their prayers as we take this journey.

‘O ke aloha kai ‘oi a’e…Ola!’”

Since the accident, Eddie and LeAnn have remained on Oʻahu to be by Ashleyʻs side. Ashley’s younger sister Eleinā has also been on O’ahu for most of this time. Ashley was recently cleared for in-person visits but for the first three weeks all visits were limited to remote camera/computer access. As most of us can only imagine, that physical separation has been heartbreaking for this family who are so close. LeAnn especially has suffered this pain while her firstborn endured those initial weeks without the touch of family.

Doctors have advised Ashleyʻs family to give her more time to allow for recovery and to be near Ashley as she heals, LeAnn and Eddie have initiated a partial move to O’ahu, but the logistics are tricky. Eddie had been away from his position as a teacher at Ke Kula’o ‘Ehunuikaimalino with the school’s blessing but needs to return soon. He plans on trying to negotiate a way to teach part-time and fly over to O’ahu weekly to support Ashley. Whether he can make this happen remains to be seen. LeAnn put her business as a childcare provider on hold and has also suspended her other business endeavors, including massage therapy for longstanding clients, and creating custom floral lei and lei po’o for a steady customer base. Her income stream has effectively disappeared until she can figure out how to restart on a different island, away from all the supply lines she has cultivated on Big Island.

Ashley’s sister Eleinā, at just 18 years old and beginning her own life journey will face the challenge of keeping things in order at their family home in Kona. This is the home that Ashley grew up in and the family has accepted the financial burden of keeping it while also committing to a long-term rental on O’ahu where they can be close to the hospital. They have already sold some big-ticket items to begin funding their needs, but their financial obligations will stretch Eddie’s income and their savings farther than it can go.

If you choose to help this family, please know that there is nothing frivolous in their budget. They have been blessed so far with housing from friends and family but have had to move twice since arriving on O’ahu. They are now working to secure a modest long-term rental for around $1000/month. LeAnn will either ship her personal vehicle or they will purchase a reliable efficient used car so she can get where she needs to go, anytime. Eddie hopes to be able to travel on a weekly basis from Kona to visit and support. They also hope to be able to have Eleinā fly over as often as is practical. All this for 6 to 12 full months. This is their commitment to Ashley’s recovery.

This is a humble family that takes nothing for granted and is not comfortable asking for help but would help anyone, anytime, just because they could. Please remember to hug your loved ones and don’t leave things unsaid if you choose to give. You honor your monetary gift with these other priceless acts from the heart.

Aloha Nui,

Darcy