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Noah’s Spark
Our 2nd baby boy, Noah Wade Rodano, kicked his way into this world March 13, 2018. He woke me up with a huge jolting kick about 2am, this broke my water and my heart was racing with excitement. Jordan called my mom and said “The Eagle has landed” this was her que to head our way to watch Lukey while we headed to the hospital. Noah was perfect, from the moment we laid eyes on him our little family felt complete. Mommy, Daddy, and big Bubba were all mesmerized by this little angel. He was our light and began to smile and giggle and laugh and play. He would let me hold him for hours and I never wanted to lay him down. The way he looked at you ... you could feel his joy and love through that little smile. Then he’d give you a little belly laugh and whatever was bothering you would just fade away no matter how big or small. He would immediately calm down when daddy played him songs on the guitar. He had begun interacting with Big Bubba and would reach for him and toys and laugh when he pretended to hurt himself. He followed me around the room no matter where I went he wanted to know where his momma was. He had started sleeping in his own crib and I’ll never forget the night he slept from 10-5. I walked in his room the next morning to pick him up...He glared into my soul with the biggest smile. His face was saying “Momma aren’t you proud of me? I missed you all night and my heart is yearning to be next to yours.” I swooped him up in my arms and gave him the biggest kiss and told him I was very proud of that big boy. It was a few short days later my whole world came to an abrupt and horrifying stop with one phone call. August 22nd 2018, 9:30am, I was at my office and my sister in law called my cell. She watched Noah and her daughter at home during the work day. She was a full time babysitter, momma, lover and the best caregiver I could ever imagine for my babies. My heart dropped when I saw her name, she never called me at work. I heard her voice and my heart fell lower, Something was terribly wrong. I knew immediately and stood up from my desk and uttered “what’s wrong, what’s wrong.” I vaguely remember hearing the words “he’s not breathing.” “He was napping, but he is blue, I don’t know what to do” “the ambulance is here, they told me to get out of the room”. My heart literally stopped beating. My world stopped turning. There was no air to breathe. There was no voice to scream. Everything went black. You can’t even fathom this feeling unless you have lived through it. That day was filled with lows but also with hope. They were able to get his heart beating again but his lungs were not working and he had no brain activity. They flew our baby to TX Children where the news only got worse. They believed he had been without oxygen for at least 15 minutes and you normally cannot recover from more than 5. We clung to prayer and begged God to heal him and make him whole again. We pleaded on our hands and knees. We cried out over and over again for him to save our baby. But to no avail his organs began to fail one by one. His intestines, his kidneys, his lungs, nothing was working. The dr finally told us he would never recover and that our little boy was no longer there it was just a non functioning body. We prayed again and decided to hold our baby as he took his final breath and leave the outcome in Gods hands. We prayed with him in my arms, please God give him life, please let him breathe, please keep his heart beating. And It did for a few moments. I saw my baby boy struggling, fighting to stay because I would selfishly not let go. I finally whispered “It’s ok baby. It’s ok to let go. I love you my angel. I don’t want this pain for you any longer.” His heart began to fade until the monitor could no longer detect a heart beat. I held his lifeless body in my arms trying to take in every detail. You never think the day will come that you will hold your child for the last time. What would you do? I’ll tell you, You smell them. You remember how heavy they are. You look at their ears and lips and nose. The wrinkles in their hands. The swirl in their hair. You cling to their body just to feel their skin against yours. But He was no longer my baby just an empty earthly body. It was not written in his story or mine for him to grow old on this earth. He is in heaven where we all strive to be. I ache to see him again and it will be a glorious reunion the day we are together again. The days...actually months, following were dark, cold, lonely. Mind Numbing pain if that makes sense. All my emotions all my feelings just seemed to be turned off. For a long time. I would have glimpses of love and hope. Don’t get me wrong I was not physically lonely I was surrounded by people and acts of kindness and true love. But, it just couldn’t fill the void, the hole that was now in my heart. I’m not healed from this hurt and pain. I don’t believe I ever will be. I am moving forward carrying my grief with me. I have a beautiful family and a new little boy, Reed, who is now 6 months old. My oldest baby Luke is now 5. My husband and I are approaching 13! Years of marriage. I have maintained my faith and hope in God. And I would like to use this tragedy to spread love and comfort in honor of our Noah. Noah’s Spark
This year for Noah’s 2nd birthday I want to start an organization in his honor. This idea came to me when I was trying to fall asleep one night and the next morning I told Jordan about it. He immediately came up with the name Noah’s Spark and it felt so perfect. Though his light was little and only burned here on earth for a short while we want to keep his memory alive forever. Our whole mission will be to spread love to all, give comfort to anyone in need and provide information and help for people dealing with grief. I would like to begin this year by handing out umbrellas with bibles tied in them and a picture and note about our sweet Noah. Myself and others would just carry them in our car until we saw someone in need. They may be homeless they may be rich. We may also visit a few shelters in years to come as we get more organized. We wanted to share this adventure with our family and friends and if you would like to donate we would greatly appreciate it. We however do not want anyone to feel obligated or guilted into helping. We love you all and hope you will follow along with us to watch this horribly tragic event somehow spread love and comfort. Please keep us in your prayers during this journey.
Our 2nd baby boy, Noah Wade Rodano, kicked his way into this world March 13, 2018. He woke me up with a huge jolting kick about 2am, this broke my water and my heart was racing with excitement. Jordan called my mom and said “The Eagle has landed” this was her que to head our way to watch Lukey while we headed to the hospital. Noah was perfect, from the moment we laid eyes on him our little family felt complete. Mommy, Daddy, and big Bubba were all mesmerized by this little angel. He was our light and began to smile and giggle and laugh and play. He would let me hold him for hours and I never wanted to lay him down. The way he looked at you ... you could feel his joy and love through that little smile. Then he’d give you a little belly laugh and whatever was bothering you would just fade away no matter how big or small. He would immediately calm down when daddy played him songs on the guitar. He had begun interacting with Big Bubba and would reach for him and toys and laugh when he pretended to hurt himself. He followed me around the room no matter where I went he wanted to know where his momma was. He had started sleeping in his own crib and I’ll never forget the night he slept from 10-5. I walked in his room the next morning to pick him up...He glared into my soul with the biggest smile. His face was saying “Momma aren’t you proud of me? I missed you all night and my heart is yearning to be next to yours.” I swooped him up in my arms and gave him the biggest kiss and told him I was very proud of that big boy. It was a few short days later my whole world came to an abrupt and horrifying stop with one phone call. August 22nd 2018, 9:30am, I was at my office and my sister in law called my cell. She watched Noah and her daughter at home during the work day. She was a full time babysitter, momma, lover and the best caregiver I could ever imagine for my babies. My heart dropped when I saw her name, she never called me at work. I heard her voice and my heart fell lower, Something was terribly wrong. I knew immediately and stood up from my desk and uttered “what’s wrong, what’s wrong.” I vaguely remember hearing the words “he’s not breathing.” “He was napping, but he is blue, I don’t know what to do” “the ambulance is here, they told me to get out of the room”. My heart literally stopped beating. My world stopped turning. There was no air to breathe. There was no voice to scream. Everything went black. You can’t even fathom this feeling unless you have lived through it. That day was filled with lows but also with hope. They were able to get his heart beating again but his lungs were not working and he had no brain activity. They flew our baby to TX Children where the news only got worse. They believed he had been without oxygen for at least 15 minutes and you normally cannot recover from more than 5. We clung to prayer and begged God to heal him and make him whole again. We pleaded on our hands and knees. We cried out over and over again for him to save our baby. But to no avail his organs began to fail one by one. His intestines, his kidneys, his lungs, nothing was working. The dr finally told us he would never recover and that our little boy was no longer there it was just a non functioning body. We prayed again and decided to hold our baby as he took his final breath and leave the outcome in Gods hands. We prayed with him in my arms, please God give him life, please let him breathe, please keep his heart beating. And It did for a few moments. I saw my baby boy struggling, fighting to stay because I would selfishly not let go. I finally whispered “It’s ok baby. It’s ok to let go. I love you my angel. I don’t want this pain for you any longer.” His heart began to fade until the monitor could no longer detect a heart beat. I held his lifeless body in my arms trying to take in every detail. You never think the day will come that you will hold your child for the last time. What would you do? I’ll tell you, You smell them. You remember how heavy they are. You look at their ears and lips and nose. The wrinkles in their hands. The swirl in their hair. You cling to their body just to feel their skin against yours. But He was no longer my baby just an empty earthly body. It was not written in his story or mine for him to grow old on this earth. He is in heaven where we all strive to be. I ache to see him again and it will be a glorious reunion the day we are together again. The days...actually months, following were dark, cold, lonely. Mind Numbing pain if that makes sense. All my emotions all my feelings just seemed to be turned off. For a long time. I would have glimpses of love and hope. Don’t get me wrong I was not physically lonely I was surrounded by people and acts of kindness and true love. But, it just couldn’t fill the void, the hole that was now in my heart. I’m not healed from this hurt and pain. I don’t believe I ever will be. I am moving forward carrying my grief with me. I have a beautiful family and a new little boy, Reed, who is now 6 months old. My oldest baby Luke is now 5. My husband and I are approaching 13! Years of marriage. I have maintained my faith and hope in God. And I would like to use this tragedy to spread love and comfort in honor of our Noah. Noah’s Spark
This year for Noah’s 2nd birthday I want to start an organization in his honor. This idea came to me when I was trying to fall asleep one night and the next morning I told Jordan about it. He immediately came up with the name Noah’s Spark and it felt so perfect. Though his light was little and only burned here on earth for a short while we want to keep his memory alive forever. Our whole mission will be to spread love to all, give comfort to anyone in need and provide information and help for people dealing with grief. I would like to begin this year by handing out umbrellas with bibles tied in them and a picture and note about our sweet Noah. Myself and others would just carry them in our car until we saw someone in need. They may be homeless they may be rich. We may also visit a few shelters in years to come as we get more organized. We wanted to share this adventure with our family and friends and if you would like to donate we would greatly appreciate it. We however do not want anyone to feel obligated or guilted into helping. We love you all and hope you will follow along with us to watch this horribly tragic event somehow spread love and comfort. Please keep us in your prayers during this journey.
Organizer
Jordan Rodano
Organizer
Tomball, TX