Randi Larson was brave enough to share the message below on her FB page. She quotes “no one brings a casserole or has a fundraiser for a family in a mental health crisis”, but we are going to change that. The financial burden of mental health treatment should not be something this family needs to worry about. The amount we need to raise is the amount for their DEDUCTIBLE! If you are able, please help with any amount you can.
“Our beautiful daughter Emma has been admitted into Newport Academy, a residential program to receive care, treatment & healing to restore her mental health and broken heart.
After extensive & repeated bullying at school and through social media that began last winter, her already taxed system could no longer support her mental and emotional wellbeing.
This school year started with someone making a tik tok account with videos specifically and viciously targeting Emma.
If you have had to navigate the mental health system in recent years- then you know how challenging and discouraging that can be.
Last winter after a suicide attempt, we were sent home from the ER because they had no where for Emma to go. Long waiting lists, multiple back and forth phone calls, being shuffled around- trying to find someone taking new clients, and parents in denial trying to navigate their own things at the same time, we were muddling through it all. After 8 weeks on a waiting list, she entered weekly therapy with a therapist that she really trusts.
I was highly resistant to the programs that I had found or that had been suggested by the ER- they seemed scary and came with their own potentially traumatic experience and still they all felt like putting a bandaid on a bleeding artery.
Also the waiting lists where so long that they weren’t even an immediate option, and I hoped that piecing together other support in the mean time would erase the need for them completely.
While therapy made a difference for awhile, another round of bullying towards the end of summer, a major life transition in our family and the severity of starting this school year off with the tik tok situation, it became apparent that she needed more support.
I googled EMDR (a form of trauma therapy) practitioners near me and Newport Academy popped up.
I clicked on it and something inside lit up. Their comprehensive approach to healing the whole child and their family to create a sustainable, healthy, well & stable child (and family) felt so different than anything else we had come across. Miracle #1
Then to my astonishment- they had a location in MN. Miracle #2
I called on a Saturday AND THEY ANSWERED THE PHONE. Miracle #3
They also had immediate openings. Miracle #4
Over the next few days we were treated with the utmost level of care and support in a way that brought me to tears multiple times.
On Wednesday at noon we said goodbye to Emma for at least 30 days, maybe longer.
We have not spoken to her as they have a 72 hour no contact policy. Leaving her there was one of the hardest things we’ve ever done- even though it was the right thing.
In the few days that we had together after her walls came down & our blinders came off, while we were gathering the support that she needed. We spent time together- loving, crying, talking, being in pain, sorting out misunderstandings and being real with ourselves and each other.
One of the things that Emma knows for sure is that there will be a day where her experience will help someone else. We talked extensively about this before she left. She also deeply believes that everyone should be able to talk about their experience & struggle with mental health openly without shame.
I am taking her lead in this and sharing the truth of where we are at and what is going on in our world.
Yesterday in our orientation the woman guiding the session brought up the loneliness and isolation that families and people can feel when they are in the middle of these experiences.
She said something that changed me.
“No one brings a casserole or has a fundraiser for a family in a mental health crisis.”
This struck me deeply.
We went through a period of crisis when our middle daughter was around the same age. I told almost no one. We navigated that very privately with close family & friends and almost no one else. I didn’t really talk about it until we were on the other side.
I have known multiple families who have navigated these situations as well- and I have not always shown up for them, known what to say, or have felt uncomfortable in knowing what to do, so I’ve done nothing or said nothing.
I no longer want that to be “the way” for me and for our family.
This is where I would typically shut down, isolate, keep everyone at an arm’s length and get very, very quiet, going deep within myself- I am unwilling to do that.
I truly want all of us to be loved and supported through this- and I am asking for your love, your thoughts, your prayers, your support, your time, your energy and your attention.
You do not have to know the answer or the solution or make it better.
We do not need to be rescued.
What I want most is the opportunity to be real, open hearted and connected, with myself and with the people in our lives.
Although I truly believe that this is happening for us and that a great healing is happening within our family, I am also heart broken, in a lot of pain and feel like our lives are unraveling.
I have thought that I have come undone before. I thought that all hell has broken loose before. I thought that we have been burned to the ground and turned to goo before, but that was all child’s play compared to this.
Yet, there is a deep sense of peace in my heart that something bigger than what I can see right now is happening and that what is being birthed is going to be absolutely beautiful.
If you would like to tell Emma how much you love her and that you are keeping her close to your heart. Shoot me a message and I will give you her address.
If you want to hug me or Nick or our other girls or you want to go for a walk or drink tea with me or fly me to your beach house shoot me a message.
If you want to tell me your story and share your experience- I would love to listen.
Hug your kids extra tight.
Tell the people you love that you love them. Check on the people you love.
Know your kid’s world.
Know what’s happening inside their phones and social media accounts.
Mental health issues don’t always present as you imagine they would.
There may be a entirely different world happening beyond what you are seeing.
The ones who seem fine are not always fine.”