Hi, my name is Vicky, my partner is James and my stepdaughter is Olivia.

Our son Riley passed away in May 2023 after his 4th brave fight with cancer. Riley fought so hard from the age of 3 on and off. The cancer (Wilms Tumour) kept returning untill sadly the cancer travelled to his brain age 16 in 2023 and he heartbreakingly passed with us all by his side.

We always say Riley may not have won his fight but cancer didn't win either, it was a draw. When Riley died, so did the cancer but boy did he put up a tremendous fight!

Two and a half years later we are all struggling with Riley being buried. We haven't been to his grave for a while because it just hurts too much. We want him at home. We need him home.

At the time, burial was right for us and what we wanted but as time goes on it's getting harder and harder.

We visited Riley every day at the chapel of rest. Seeing him daily, his body, we had him embalmed, he was our boy and he was beautiful. The thought of having him cremated wasn't an option for us back then.

Now with time having passed, we are not oblivious to the fact nature will have taken over. For that reason the thought of cremation doesn't bother us quite as much as it once did.

All I know is this over whelming feeling to have my boy at home is taking over me daily. I can't bear to visit his grave. His grave feels like a burden, a white elephant. Thinking of him all alone in the cold in a field pains me. We dont visit as much anymore for the sake of our mental health but then it makes me worse because then guilt takes over. It's this vicious circle of guilt and pain.

Grief is hard enough to navigate without living with the extra pain of wanting your child home.

October to December were Rileys favourite months. Snuggles, films, board games, cuppa tea, cosy winter nights. But 'he's' alone in the cold.

It feels like we've abandoned our son in a field.

I know we can never have what we truly want but the thought of him at home in some form feels right.

This isn't a decision we've made lightly, we've discussed this over and over for a year now because it would be irreversible.

We also know 100% this won't end our grief or loss, we arent going into this lightly or naively. It isn't something that will make the loss of our son any easier but it feels right.

Our wish is to now have Riley cremated and home.

We have had the full total of how much exhumation and cremation would cost which is £7793.65.

(Excluding an urn and having his headstone brought home and set in our garden as this is obviously already existing and we will still have it as a memorial)

The £7793.65 price is for the crematorium to exume Riley, machinery, police, environmental health, wages, man power, transportation, cremation, getting the licence, ground difficulty as it's clay cemetery, funeral directors fees for their presence and a new larger coffin to carry all remains.

Once we have met with the Crematorium and Funeral Directors we will post the documentation of the bills from both professional parties.

We have been told once we meet with them, have the licence and have set the ball rolling, the turn around to have Riley exhumed could be as little as 20 days.

I'd like to add we would not be present for the exhumation or the cremation. Firstly as we are not allowed to be present for exhumation and secondly we had our final goodbye and don't feel it necessary to add any futher trauma.

We would simply fetch Riley once all is done and bring him home.

Alot of you have commented or messaged and suggested a Gofundme.

You are all so appreciated and your kind comments have made me so emotional. You have all been on this journey with us years now and have been truly amazing.

Those that have been on this journey with Riley and us as a family since 2019 when we first shared Rileys story on social media are unbelievably supportive and your love for our boy has been profound.

We appreciate you all so much x

Please do not feel you have to donate and please only donate if you financially can do so.

#rileycliftonyoullneverwalkalone ❤️