Where to start! We have been together 8 years and we have been trying to have a baby for 6-7 years now. We have gone through 7 failed IUIs over those years, with no medical coverage and all paid out of pocket. This year we did our first round of IVF, also with no medical coverage, paying around $21,000 out of pocket. We prepared for IVF with a specific medicine and vitamin regimen, and I lost 30 pounds to be able to move forward. We were able to afford it by rigorous saving, working extra side jobs (thank you Postmates), a fundraiser, a few loans and the love and support of our family and friends. It was such a blessing to be able to do that and not go broke. The honest truth is, IVF was one of the most challenging rollercoasters of life we have yet to be on together. Not only is it physically painful but it is more mentally taxing than I ever imagined. Not to mention, I was unexpectedly unemployed right before we started (which truly ended up being a blessing in disguise). We were able to retrieve 5 mature eggs. 4 fertilized. 3 made it to day 5, and we transferred one before freezing the other two. That transfer ended in a very early miscarriage, which is called a chemical pregnancy. These were the darkest days of my life. I’ve never experienced that kind of grief before. I didn’t think there would be light at the end of the tunnel. We eventually recovered as much as one can, and regained hope to try again by transferring our last two embryos in July. Neither of the embryos took this round. Complete devastation again knowing those were the last ones we had. The emotional heartbreak was also coupled with pain so bad I had to go back to the doctor to make sure there wasn’t a serious issue and ended up in pain killers and bed rest. It was horrible.So obviously, I wasn’t sure I wanted to do this again. I’m sure all of you reading understand this thinking. Why would I go through all of it again. The pain. The bruising. The nausea. The bloating. The restricted lifestyle. The getting your hopes up to maybe have them let down. The potential failure and utter heart break it could bring. I was ready to just give up on my dream of being a mom for awhile if not forever. This is a dream I’ve had my whole life, and I was ready to walk away.And then something switched one day. I want to give it one last shot (or round of shots). I need to do one more round. I have to give it my ALL, even more than last time before I give up my dream. I talked to my doctor (WHO WE LOVE) and she believes we are still great candidates for a successful round of IVF. She believes that we know how my body responds now and could tailor a plan better for me with meds if we wanted to do another round. And she let me know there is a chance I could be a part of a study in January/February 2019 with our clinic that would help pay for $1800 of meds, AND could potentially put us in a randomized group that gets genetic testing for free. During our last round we did not do PGS testing (the genetic testing) due to it being an additional $5000-10,000. However, by doing the testing we would learn which of our embryos are genetically sound, and which are abnormal chromosomally. If an embryo is abnormal, it is likely to not implant at all OR it is likely to end in miscarriage. So by doing the trial, it would give us a 33% chance at getting this extra knowledge at no extra cost. And if we didn’t end up in the testing leg of the trial, we still have saved some money in medicine.That brings me to this page. Since we have spent so much this year already, we are unsure that we can make the goal to be able to pay for it by January. We are trying so hard, and are saving again. I will be starting my Postmates deliveries again. Jer has a few side projects as well. However, if we get to the trial and cannot pay we would have to pass the opportunity up. We are not sitting back idly hoping for a change. We are preparing. We started the keto diet which has proven to help fertility, and weight loss in general will help IVF. I have educated myself about the impact of BPA, phthalates and toxins on fertility and am making changes to our lifestyle to avoid these things. I’m taking more supplements and taking better care of what I am putting in my body. We are paying off loans from earlier and trying to put back money at the same time. It’s a challenge at all directions but we are facing them with hope.While I absolutely HATE asking for more help, as so many have helped already, I feel like this may be the only way we will make the deadline. We do not expect any donations. I have no expectation here. I just know that right now we are giving this all we’ve got to try to make it happen and that there are people that love us and want to help us succeed. So, if you can give, I literally don’t have enough words of gratitude. If you can’t, I still cannot thank you enough for your support and prayers. And if everyone could try to share our story, that would mean the world. Infertility is one of the biggest unspoken things in the world we live in today and I personally just like my story being shared to try and break that stigma.