I'm about to be very transparent. It's hard to hold anything back when feel as if you've been backed into a corner and your screaming to get out! This is not where we want to be, and this is certainly not how we thought today would end, when we woke up yesterday!
To be reliving this deja vu again and again is emotionally draining!
First here's some background to understand what journey this disease has taken this family on:
My nephew Braden Boozer, was diagnosed with neuroblastoma when he was only 2 years old.
Chemo treatment began and a trip to NYC was scheduled for a major surgery to remove the abdominal tumor, once there, Doctors determined treatment worked, and only a biopsy surgery was performed.
3 years of a normal childhood was to follow with only routine scans to keep an eye on everything.
Life was great with Kindergarten about to begin, he was so excited!
Then it showed its ugly face again and this time it was very aggressive.
His first major surgery was able to remove 95% of his abdominal tumor. After months of Chemo treatment, another surgery successfully removed a remaining piece on his kidney.
Routine scans followed once more to ensure it was gone for good.
And it was...So We Thought!!
Blind sided again, but this time not only had Braden's tumor resurfaced, his mother, my sister, Jessica Boozer was diagnosed with a sarcoma tumor on the back of her left leg.
Now both battling this horrible disease, receiving treatments simultaneously, being just across the street from one another.
'No one fights alone' was more realistic than ever imagined!
Braden's treatment took a different approach in combination with antibodies and radiation was also included.
Another trip to NYC, but the big surgery planned before was going into play. Hard to recover, but as Braden always does, he pulled through, just in time for Jessica to return home for her treatment. The following January, Jessica's tumor was successfully treated and removed and she is still cancer free.
All back home safe and sound, we found our self at peace once more.
Braden was able to be a 'normal' kid again....going to school, playing sports, and the best part to him was having his baby brother by his side to play with.
...Until last summer (2017) Braden's tumor was back AGAIN!!! Still primarily in the abdomen, but not quite as large.
Back to NYC this past November, being able to enjoy a few fun days and then the same major surgery was performed again! Successfully removed once more and with a much faster recovery!! Braden has to be a pro by now!
So fast forward almost 8 months later, here we are at today. (8-7-18)
Yesterday, Braden just went through yet another surgery, this time to remove a brain tumor they found a few days ago and my heart is so heavy.
In the past he was so young and naive, not knowing what was happening or what to expect.
Now, 8 1/2 years old he is so more aware than we imagined. After they told him the news,
When Jess asked him, "Buddy, what do you think about all this?"
He said "I hate cancer, I don't want to die."
Speechless I broke down in tears when she told me this! Wow! How in the world do you respond to that! How is that an 8 year olds' worry right now??!!
How do you explain situations like this to yourself or anyone else, and most of all a little kid, that should be living a carefree life. Worrying about his spelling test instead he's worrying about his cancer coming back and another surgery. This is what his life has been. Notice how I said cancer came BACK and ANOTHER surgery, when he shouldn't have had to endure the first round!! Not to mention the 2nd, 3rd & 4th, or is this the 5th?? It's hard to even keep count of how many surgeries he's had!!
That in itself shows the severity of this disease!! Cancer SUCKS!
From the words of Jessica Boozer: (April 11, 2017)
"Five years of worry, five years of gratefulness, five years of scans, surgeries, chemo hell, radiation, throw up bags, sick days, hospital stays, port access, three trips to NYC, multiple scars, bald heads, pokes and prods, the list could go on. As I think about all the negativity that comes along with cancer, I can't help but to also reflect on all the good things that have come out of it. We have first hand witnessed the giving hearts of people all around us. We have been blessed with so much from prayers, meals, gifts, fundraisers, and humanity at its finest! We have met more strangers on this journey who when I met them feel like family. It is amazing to me to see how much a stranger can love my child and our family and bend over backwards to help in anyway they can.
After five years, I know this...God IS a MIRACLE worker, people ARE Angels on Earth, It DOES take a village to raise a child, Family IS a precious GIFT and BLESSING that not everyone has, Cancer sucks really bad, but it's NOT the end of the world, God is OUR Healer and our Redeemer!
So, THANK you! Thank you to everyone who has sustained us through these past five years. We could not have done it with out you all!"
This is a completely different road than we've traveled before, and there are a lot of unknowns while still await test results and biopsies.
I'm sad yes, heart broken, AGAIN, but more than anything...this time I'M ANGRY!! So very angry!!!
There has always been the question "why him, and not me".
But why anyone?
Something's I just don't understand and never will!
I know none of us have the answers! I know that no one knows what tomorrow will bring and I know that, I myself am not even promised tomorrow!
Only God knows the answers and they don't belong to us!
I do know that our GOD is an awesome GOD and he will prevail. He is our strength, when we are weak, He is our shelter in the storm, He is our way when we our lost, He is our rock on which we build our foundation of hope and faith and He is our light in the darkness.
I also know, that the enemy will do everything in his power to keep us down, to keep us in the dark and to try and take our faith away.
Not this girl! Not this time! I am a women of God and I know the power He holds and the miracles He can perform, because I've seen them! I've seen them mostly through Braden himself and the journey GOD has brought us through. He has done it before and HE WILL do it again!!
We need only be still and let Him fight for us!
"Satan may roar, but my defender is The Lion of Judah and HE will fight for me... I need only be still" Exodus 14:14
"Don't worry about anything; instead, pray about everything; tell GOD your needs and don't forget to thank Him for His answers. If you do this, you will experience GOD's peace, which is far more wonderful
than the human mind can understand. His peace will keep your thoughts and your hearts quiet and at rest as you trust in Jesus Christ." Philippians 4:6-7
"So do not fear, for I am with you; Do not be dismayed for I am your GOD.
I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand" Isaiah 41:10
Please continue to pray for Braden, Jessica, Brandon, Bryson and our families.
We know how special Braden is and all the joy he brings to anyone he meets. I know that God has huge plans for this precious child, and he is the strongest person I know and a fighter to the core! May God continue to strengthen him and heal his little body, for we know his story is an inspiration to all!
"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord; plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. " Jeremiah 29:11
Please clink the link below for a short and sweet video of Braden:
- Meg Spears
- Lita Hovis
- Biagio Reyna
- Autumn DECKER
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