Hi, my name is Ashley Doukas and I’m Monique Doukas’s daughter and Reggie Young’s stepdaughter. I’m writing this post on their behalf because we need your help.

Early on January 17, 2024, Reggie unexpectedly had two consecutive grand mal seizures, which my mom witnessed. He was rushed to the hospital by ambulance. We tried to be optimistic-- "maybe it's just his blood sugar"-- but soon learned that he had a mass on his brain. We clung to hope that it might be benign and I was of course frantically Googling the chances that it was (about 66% likely, if you were wondering).

After further imaging, our worst fears were confirmed: Reggie had undiagnosed lung cancer that had spread to his brain and caused the seizures. This devastating news turned our world upside down in an instant- we've been vacillating between shock, terror, and the most gut-wrenching despair.

Why Reggie, this incredibly sweet, gentle, giving, soft-spoken, and hard-working man, who has already known so much hardship in his life? Why my mom, whose marriage to my dad was destroyed by his severe and persistent mental illness, who lost everything already? They have both had to start over so many times. Their years together have been marked by both financial hardship and immense love as they rebuilt a beautiful new life together with their cat and many houseplants, with a dream of someday building their own home to grow old in together. To those who know their story, it often feels like they can just never catch a break.

As a trauma psychologist, I know that these illnesses are not punishments and that so many good people experience terrible tragedy every day. I also know that there were risk factors: Reggie was a smoker for over 40 years. He started in childhood, when the long-term consequences were incomprehensible. I also know as a psychologist that nicotine/cigarettes are the most addictive substance to quit, even more so than heroin.

After much urging to start going to the doctor, Reggie began seeing a primary care physician for preventative care. In June 2023, the lung screening his doctor ordered for him was denied by the insurance company. Soon after, and despite working two jobs, often consecutively in the same day, he lost his health insurance altogether--unfortunately, the demanding masonry work he was doing did not come with benefits--and never got the screening. We can’t help but wonder whether this could have been caught much earlier had he had access to the appropriate care. Why would a man with 40 years of smoking history, aged over 50, be denied such a routine screening? If he's not eligible for this, then who is?

Shortly thereafter, he quit smoking in solidarity with my mom, who was recently diagnosed with a cardiac condition. It speaks to his love and dedication to her, that helping her prolong her life gave him the strength to quit. They couldn’t have done it without each other, and we are all so proud. Unfortunately, it was already too late.

Does it make sense that a smoker who had no access to medical care due to poverty and insurance company greed has invasive cancer now? Yeah, it kinda does. But that doesn’t make it fair and no one could ever deserve this, especially not Reggie.

As Reggie lay in the ER hallway after being told he had cancer in his brain, in terrible pain and in and out of consciousness, his first concerns centered on his inability to work. It absolutely breaks my heart that he was worried about money and losing their home at a time like this. Of all their worries right now, I don’t want it all to be about money yet again. I want to do everything I can to help them stay afloat as he undergoes treatment at Portsmouth Hospital, but I can’t do it all myself.

We don’t yet know what lies ahead for Reggie, or how much time he may have left. The current plan is to remove and biopsy the brain tumor on Tuesday, 1/23. He will also likely undergo surgery to remove the tumor on his lung. Based on the biopsy results, his treatment team will be forming a longer-term treatment plan likely to include chemo and radiation. That these tumors are operable is a hopeful sign. I will continue to post updates here as we get them.

I hate that we have to ask for help because getting sick in this country almost always means money concerns. I know so many of you are also struggling right now. Anything you can do to help is so deeply appreciated. All proceeds will go to paying their living expenses while he’s out of work and allow my mom the opportunity to be by his side. If you can’t do a financial contribution, then even a share and some kind words would mean so much to us.

Thank you for taking the time to read ❤️