Writing this will be the hardest words I’ll ever put from ink to paper, or in this case text to screen. If you know me, you know I can write a book explaining something, but I’ll try to be as brief and transparent as I can be in this vulnerable time. Over the last few weeks I have been asking myself how I could find the words to ask people, potential strangers for help? How was I deserving or worthy of such a request when there are so many in this world that are in much greater and dire need? So many are suffering, this hard economy has come for us all, and I am no different. I have been humbled, praying for guidance, for God or someone to justify me making this post. But then I remembered, God does not measure our pain and suffering, he doesn’t leave us to drown even if someone else has been treading harder or longer. He hears us all, and wants us to reach out to him in times of need and in times of joy. So here is me reaching up from rock bottom, asking for help. As many of you that are close to me know I suffer from a chronic illness, Lupus, which causes countless other health issues along with it. My body is currently in a flare that’s going haywire and nearly all my blood levels are off and we are working to get back on track. The list is long, but this year I have had multiple hospital visits and new health issues that have came to the surface, adding new Specialists, and more visits to come. I am spending my days fighting with insurance to get things covered and set up payment plans on out standing bills that I can’t keep up with. My 3 year old son has also had multiple hospital visits and scans from his compromised immune system and lung function after having Covid and Pneumonia multiple times. The biggest hit came a few weeks ago while in the middle of a dental procedure, my body does what it does, and things did not go as planned. My bones are like dust and crumble like wafer paper, It took a different turn, and instantly that procedure came with a $2,000+ bill difference. The amount of medical debt is unreal and even I don’t know the true damage as I dodge multiple collections agencies daily. My Husband was working at Autozone on the weekends, that also had to stop as well due to the fact my health has declined and he has become the current primary care giver not only for our three year old son, but me as well. The majority of my weekends are spent resting, trying to build up my strength for the next week. You will never see me and know I am struggling, I am the master of disguise and I refuse to let the negativity and stress steal my joy and light.I will continue to work hard, push myself to my limits, all with a smile on my face because that is the only option I give myself. You keep going, you push forward no matter how hard the road is ahead. Recently at a conference a quote was said that has stuck with me, “When asked if my cup is half full or half empty, my only response now is that I'm thankful I have a cup”…and that is truly how I try and live my life, grateful to even have a cup. Right now my cup is empty. But I have faith, and gratefulness for the opportunity and fight in me to fill that cup again. I am coming to my friends, family and community to ask for any kind of help for me and my little family to help us get our heads back above water. If it’s monetarily, prayers, or keeping us in your thoughts, surrounding us with support and love…we are in need of ALL of the above. Anything that is donated will go directly to medical bills and medical expenses, as I try to avoid any kind of wage garnishment or civil collections. For those that will suggest it, I am unable to currently file bankruptcy or qualify for emergency/consolidation loans due to filing medical bankruptcy after my previous divorce. I have exhausted all options before reaching this point. This is quite literally the hardest, and most degrading thing I’ve ever made the decision to do. Please do not think I take any of this lightly. If you made it this long through my inevitable book , thank you. If you graciously give to me and my family, thank you…from the bottom of my heart. Know that once these hard times are behind us I will continue to pass this kindness forward and never forget the grace and love we have been shown. From my little family to all of you, we love you. -The Stoners