Support The Weddle Family Through Tom's Cancer

Hello there,

My name is Debbie. I know that I'm a "new friend" for many folks on this profile, but I wanted to explain why that is, and what's going on in our family's life. You see, I was one of those busy moms who always kept up with our online friends by getting updates from my husband. Even though I've never met many of you, your names, pthat, families, and comments are always well a discussed in our home so that I felt like I knew many of you without ever having you as a friend on Facebook. Why can't we keep being 'virtual' friends via my husband's account like before? Well, that is what this post is about.

Because cancer has visited our family, and we're not sure it is going to leave. In fact, the doctors tell us it is here to stay -- and very likely, my husband isn't going to be with me on this side of heaven much longer.

A friend recently told me that I should be gathering friends and support for the road ahead, and that's what this post is: I'm facing the worst months of my life: watching my always-strong-for-me husband fight the battle for his life. She pointed out that since my connection with many of you was always through my husband, people wouldn't know what was going on unless I connected with them, too.

Many of you know my husband Thomas. He's the love of my life. I know most women say that, but it was as true for me as it's ever been for any couple. We have been married almost 33 years now; twenty-five of those years I spent as a homeschool mom to our 5 children while Tom worked to provide for his all. As the economy shifted and changed in those years, Thomas shifted and changed to meet the need of the hour. For the last few years, he's wondered in home remodeling.

Just a few months back, we traveled from our home in Tennessee to the area I grew up in Southern Indiana to do a three-week remodeling job for a friend. Things were going just fine for about a week and a half, until Tom came down with what we assumed was a stomach bug. After a few days of no improvement, we went to the doctor and were told that Tom needed to have his gallbladder removed. We had that done right away! We thought, "Great! That's over -- back to work!"

At our two-week post-op, on Nov. 6th, the surgeon gave us very unexpected news: the gallbladder pathology report had come back cancerous. This came as such a shock! I mean, Thomas had gone back to work on the remodel just three days after his gallbladder surgery! He was tired and moving slower than normal, but that was Thomas: he had to get the job done.

The surgeon wanted a PET scan and other tests, subsequently it was believed that cancer cells were limited to the fossa of the liver, where the gallbladder attached,, so we were immediately referred to a cancer surgeon.

The cancer surgeon advised that time was critical, so we scheduled a liver resection to address his problem. It was to be a 3-4 hour long surgery so I was rather surprised when the surgeon came in to speak with me after only about an hour. She told me that once they had gotten inside, they saw that the cancer had already spread to his peritoneum, colon, and of course the liver. When she saw this, the surgeon took some biopsies and closed him back up. Needless to say, the news was rather devastating.

The evening following that unsuccessful surgery, there was some strange snafu at the hospital. Whatever it was kept Tom's nurses from bringing him pain meds for over seven hours. That was way too long! The massive uncontrolled pain threw him into a heart attack. This new development brought another doctor into our lives. He was scheduled for the Cath lab the next afternoon but had yet another heart attack that morning, which moved him up on the schedule. The cardiac surgeon said he had 3 blockages. Two were 90% blocked and the other was at 100%. A stent was placed into one of them. It kind of hit me hard when that doctor came in and said, " After we deal with the cancer, he needs open heart surgery."

So by now it was the beginning of January and our lives...our lives were, as always, in God's hands, but they had never felt more out of control.

Next, we were referred to an oncologist. She informed us that he has Stage 4 Metastatic Adenocarcinoma. Her recommendation was chemotherapy and immune therapy. The harsh reality for us is that we have no health insurance. I can't even guess what our current hospital bills amount to, already. I know that the immune therapy , which she had recommended, is $10,000.00 per treatment.

So here we are. A 'three-week job in October' has now been a four-month medical nightmare with no end in sight. We've spent this time staying with my mother in IN. She lost my step-father to cancer some years back, so she understands the journey we're on! Because of having established so much medical care in Indiana and having some of my family in the area, we need to move from our rental house in Tennessee to be near Thomas' team of doctors. Those doctors have told us that I may have up to 18 months with my dear Thomas with chemotherapy and only 2-3 months without it. My heart is shattered needless to say. My once strong, 6' tall, 230 lb. husband now weighs about 130 lb. and tires quickly.

We've started several 'alternative' anti cancer treatments, as we can afford them. We've switched to a ketogenic diet to try to 'starve' the cancer and have a whole slew of supplements coming in the mail to help his body fight this cancer.

Those of you who know me personally understand just how hard it is to share this story. It is hard and very humbling to admit you need help, but that is where we find ourselves. Going several months without income and even just the nickle-and-dime expenses that come from being involved with the medical system have left us extremely cash strapped. Paying all of the expenses of living in Tennessee for several months, while in Indiana, ran through much of our savings.

This is where we are looking to the Lord's mercy for provision. God is always good! His Word encourages us daily. I praise Him for His gracious 'giving' of so many blessings in my life...but I also want to praise Him through my tears and heartbreaking sadness for His 'taking away.' Tom has always encouraged me to be grateful for the suffering. Honestly, I am struggling to be grateful for this particular suffering, but I know the Lord will get us through this. In reality, the only hope we have in this world is Christ and that is where our faith lies. We lay all of these things at the foot of the cross. I just need to get better at leaving it there. God speaks only truth in His word. We are trusting first and foremost in Him.

Philippians 4:19

" But my God shall supply all your needs according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus."

I am starting a 'gofundme' page to help us with mounting bills, relocation, and basic living expenses for a time as we go through this. I am willing to go get a job here in Indiana, but Thomas' medical care, appointments, calls, and etc. are taking so much of my time. I also feel like I have the rest of my life to get a job if I lose my Thomas, but I made a promise to God that I would be with him through sickness and in health until death parted us, and I intend to keep that promise. If you would please take us to the Lord in prayer, and if you are able, please consider helping us. We covet your prayers and would be grateful beyond measure for anything that is put upon your heart to give.

In Him Who Heals,

Debbie Weddle