Support Sadie's Eyebrow Restoration

Help Sadie Regrow her lost legacy: A GoFundMe for the eyebrowless

#EyebrowsBeforeEgos

Dear friends, family, and follicle enthusiasts,

We come to you with heavy hearts and even lighter brows. Sadie—our beautiful, brave, and tragically under-eyebrowed friend—is down to a mere 17 eyebrow hairs. That’s not per brow. That’s total. Seventeen tiny soldiers clinging to her face like survivors of a post-apocalyptic mascara wasteland.

This isn’t just a cosmetic issue. This is a humanitarian crisis.

Doctors estimate she may soon reach critical baldness, a point at which the brows cease to exist and are replaced solely by vague expressions and desperation.

Sadie has tried everything:

• Rubbing castor oil like it’s holy water

• Whispering affirmations to her brow bone

• Consulting a shaman

Nothing has worked.

Your generous donation will go toward:

• Premium microblading

• An emotional support pencil

• Eyebrow therapy

• A team of brow engineers flown in from Europe

No one should have to live like this—not in 2025.

Help Sadie raise her brows (and her spirits). Give her the arch she deserves.

Donate now. Because beauty is only skin-deep, but eyebrows are right on top of it.

#SaveSadies17

#BrowsBeforeBros