Support military widow and disabled daughter in time of need

Hello friends and family.

I have been putting forth my very best effort to remain positive but I have been feeling alone and desperate. My situation is not good. I am a survivor so I tend to hide the real true brutal facts from every one and I always am positive and supportive to friends.

There has been too much happening at once, one after the other, and it’s only me taking care of everything.

And it’s finally caught up with me, due to my age ( I am in my 70s ) my declining health and too much happening at once, one after the other; and I am literally the only one taking care of everything. And it’s finally caught up with me. I am afraid of being without power or water in my home, and worse- losing the literal roof over my head.

In order to maintain my household and have some semblance of stability in mine and my daughter’s lives, we are going to need some help.

My rent is almost $2,500 a month. This does not include bills such as Utilities: Gas and Electric, Water; - and other basic necessities.

My deceased husband is a Vietnam Veteran. I am a Military widow. my husband’s illnesses were acquired while he served in Vietnam, which resulted in his passing away, years later.

The source of my income is Social Security retirement and VA Military Widow’s compensation. This income is not sufficient enough to cover my past due bills.

After paying rent, I have less than $300.

I am almost one year behind with my utilities and my power and water are about to be shut off.

My daughter, Lara who lives with me, is mentally and physically disabled as a result of being a victim of a violent crime against her. Her doctor wants to schedule major spinal surgery to repair the damage inflicted upon her spine. It may be scheduled in about 4 weeks, after which she’ll have a lengthy period of rehabilitation.

In order to maintain my household and have some semblance of stability in mine and my daughter’s lives, we are going to need some help.

I am in complete disbelief and shock and it’s difficult for me to function each day!

I am not well after enduring the loss of my son and husband in a short period of time.

As I previously mentioned, my daughter is physically and mentally disabled and is in need of surgery.

I am so devastated by too much happening at once. And I need to find a way to keep the roof over our heads, and our electricity and water from shutting off, due to being almost a year behind.

I have no choice but to reach out and very humbly ask for help.

I am in my 70s. My health is declining as a result of severe trauma.

My youngest son became sick due to brain cancer and complications from that which caused his passing almost five years ago.

My husband passed only two years ago as a result of Parkinson’s and liver cancer.

I’ve been struggling with complicated grief and PTSD as a result of watching my beloved youngest son endure complications of cancer and then passing, and also due to seeing my husband become ill and passing. My daughter’s being attacked, abducted and beaten for over a period of 6 years, resulting in her disability, had added to my trauma and has compounded it.

Currently, our family, besides my daughter Lara and I, includes three grown children, who live on the east coast. My oldest

son takes care of his wife who is a liver transplant recipient. My middle son has a disabled daughter and he helps with her care. My other daughter is able to visit about once per year. Each of them have donated what they can afford.

We are asking for the donation amount in my fundraiser to help pay my utility bills which are way past due, and are on the verge of being shut off, and for rent, and to use for gas for driving to doctor appointments, and for basic necessities.

I am a private person who does my best to be supportive and positive to others on a daily basis.

I have attempted to resolve my recent problems on my own, over the past several years, and especially this past year, which is why I have hesitated with posting this.

However, with a heavy heart, I am reluctantly having to ask for help.

My family have experienced a series of circumstances that have occurred over the past several years.

I feel that I need to disclose the details of my story which would clarify to everyone what they are and the specific reasons why I am in the circumstances under which I am facing. Furthermore this would explain why I need help with donations.

Here are the details of my story:

In these past five years, two of my beloved family members had become seriously ill, and then passed as a result of their illnesses. In addition, my daughter, Lara has become severely disabled. These circumstances have devastated me on so many levels. However, I had managed to do the best I could.

Most recently, within this past year, my daughter, Lara’s disability deteriorated and most of my time is spent caring for her and assisting her.

Lara’s disability is the result of her being a victim of a violent crime.

A person living in our community befriended her and soon after, abducted her, held her against her will, repeatedly; and while also threatening her life with beatings, torture and with guns, over a period of approximately six plus years. During those periods of time, as I mentioned, he held her against her will while beating her, torturing her, and forcing her to ingest hard drugs, and including other horrific details which I choose to not disclose; he did all of that while also withholding food and water for days. Throughout this time, Lara would sometimes manage to escape and remain at home for a couple of days. However, this predator would find her while she would be out food shopping for the family, running errands for me, and then he would abduct her again.

My family, including Lara, also consisted of my youngest son, Nick, my granddaughter, Suzanne, my husband Dan and myself.

During the time Lara was being abducted and hurt by the predator I mentioned, my family whom I mentioned here, and I had no idea that this was happening to Lara.

This predator had not only threatened Lara’s life but he also threatened to hurt our family, if she disclosed what he was doing to her. Lara was in fear for her’s and for her family’s lives, if she disclosed her situation, and asked for help.

It was during this period of time, that my son, Nick was battling brain cancer and he and I were involved with getting him to his cancer treatments; his radiation and chemo, which spanned over a period of about 6 to 7 years. I was so invested in helping and supporting my son throughout everything that fighting cancer entails, that I was unaware that my daughter Lara was very often absent from our home for long periods of time. I assumed that she was working or just busy with her life. It wasn’t until I noticed a change in her demeanor that I sensed something was wrong.

Her terrorizing and horrific abuse came to an end several years after it began, when my daughter left her phone at home, and I saw an urgent, unsent text message, in which she was asking for help. The text included certain disturbing details of what her abuser was inflicting upon her, and that she was in fear for her life.

She was rescued by police when I had seen her text and then I had immediately called 911 to report that she was being held against her will and that her life was in danger. They responded immediately with police cars and a helicopter circling his house. This predator held a gun to her head, threatening to shoot her and himself. Fortunately, the police were able to break in and remove her in time.

My daughter Lara has not been the same since this happened to her.

The mental, emotional and physical abuse caused by the violence the predator inflicted upon her, have left psychological trauma and emotional scars, and permanent damage to Lara’s spine, from which may take a lifetime for her to recover.

Her orthopedic specialist has recommended major spinal surgery for her in the next month.

I have been supportive for my daughter, to the best of my ability, and am willing to do whatever it takes to help her and to help myself.

Lara is a good person and has always been supportive of her brother and me while he was fighting cancer and then when he lost his battle.

Lara was also a tremendous help while I was caring for my husband Dan when he could no longer care for himself. She has always been a kind and selfless person.

It feels surreal to me as I write this story, and reread it.

I too have suffered emotional trauma from everything, beginning with the complicated grief I experience from my son’s battle with brain cancer, subsequently losing his courageous fight; and then my trauma and grief from watching my husband’s health deteriorate rapidly and then his untimely passing.

Needless to say that when my daughter, Lara’s abduction and torture became exposed; then her trauma and pain and suffering as a result; it has further compounded my own physical, emotional health and trauma.

I often don’t know how I have remained strong enough to help and support my family through all of what we have endured.

Throughout everything, I find that I miss my husband Dan and my son Nick more than ever now. I am certain that they would have remained steadfast and strong throughout all of this; They were always my shoulder to lean on and an ear to listen.

I have been holding my household together through all of this; And now with just my daughter and I, I am the only one able to take care of us. I pray every day, often moments at a time, for continued strength.

I shared many details of my situation which, might seem surreal or terrible, to say the least, to whomever has taken the time to read my story; And for that I am grateful and I thank you.

I want to take just a few more moments of your time to describe and explain the remainder of my story. Please bear with me.

Here it is:

My emotional and physical strength are not the only factors at risk.

Our financial situation, which includes our home and the basics such as rent, utility bills, etc., are unstable.

We rely on my income alone, which is my Social Security Retirement and Veteran’s Widows Compensation from the Veterans Administration. These are not sufficient to cover my living expenses.

I begin each day, feeling emotionally and physically weakened and I am increasingly feeling hopeless and like there is nowhere to turn.

Because I am a natural fighter, I have not wanted to admit to myself that my mental and physical health has been declining as a result of what seems like insurmountable and highly stressful, (both past and current) circumstances and situations as well.

I often feel like I have no fight left in me.

My income barely gets us by.

My husband and I had been planning our retirement and were working on improving our finances.

My husband, Dan, a Vietnam Veteran, developed Parkinson’s and liver cancer as a result of chemicals released during that war, and which caused his untimely passing, only two years after being diagnosed. My husband, Dan had always worked even when he semi retired. Dan had always been responsible with our household bills. However, his Parkinson’s illness caused him to make mistakes , which is something I discovered after he had passed.

I didn’t have all the knowledge of how Parkinson’s affects the brain. Also, it was not apparent that Dan’s mind was not as sharp as it had been and that he was declining mentally and was suffering from a form of Dementia caused by Parkinson’s Disease.

I had been by my son, Nick’s side as he battled brain cancer, which often entailed sitting with him during the rough periods of radiation and chemo. This became my primary focus. Therefore, I did not notice any signs of decline in my husband’s mental capabilities. I was preoccupied with helping my son fight for his life. It wasn’t until Dan had passed that I discovered his savings account had been depleted. His credit cards were maxed out as well. And I also soon discovered that he did not have life insurance, as he told me he had. Needless to say, this had come as a shock to me, and the results of which led me to where I am currently, without any financial stability. Dan was a very good man who had always been responsible and had provided not only for me but also for my family. We loved and respected Dan and appreciated his generosity, his love and kindness for all of us.

I took care of Dan at home as his illnesses deteriorated, causing him to be bedridden. This was a very difficult situation due to my daughter, Lara’s deteriorating spine condition and her other disabilities, which I described in the previous paragraphs of my story.

My daughter, Lara helped me while also dealing with her own impaired physical and mental health; and, actually, I would not have been able to manage any of it without her help.

Currently, I am helping my daughter Lara with her doctor appointments regarding her disabilities, and with her daily self care.

I have been seriously contemplating and actively seeking employment, and have been putting efforts into that as well.

My hopes are to be employed part-time in the near future. However, I need to get through and over my current circumstances.

I have put so much thought and effort into finding a solution that would alleviate certain immediate circumstances, which is my reason for posting a GoFundMe, and asking for donations.

I am very humbly asking for the smallest donation. Any amount will help.

We don’t need food. I am enrolled in a food bank which gets my daughter and I through until the end of each month.

The donations would be used for basics such as my 2 utility bills which are too high, and at the point of being shut off.

After rent, I barely have enough for anything except basic utilities and gas to drive to doctor appointments.

I don’t qualify for any programs.

I am not looking for suggestions for programs that might help.

I have already inquired and have resources, but there is quite a long waiting period.

My rent is high. However, I cannot move. Also, rents are high everywhere.

I feel that I need to come out from under. And, after much thought and many months have passed, I have decided to post this GoFundMe.

I don’t want to ask for help.

This is my last resort.

In addition, I feel quite humbled posting this - and asking for help.

In summary, even the smallest donation adds up, and would help so much.

This would allow me to catch up with Utility Bills and start fresh, afterwards I would be paying them when due.

I am quite humbly asking for help.

Any donation starting at $5 is humbly appreciated.

If you cannot donate, I do understand.

It would be so helpful if you would please post this and share this as well.

Prayers for my daughter and me are also so very needed.

I appreciate you taking the time to read this.

Thank you for taking the time to read my story!

My Warmest Regards,

Rose Curatolo