Support Nikita and Her Baby's Fight for Life

Hello everyone, my name is Nikita as you may know. My life has recently taken a huge turn, which brings me to ask you guys for help. I am currently pregnant with my second child, a boy. When I was 20 weeks pregnant, I went for my anatomy ultrasound scan. That is when everything hit hard! I found out that I was one centimeter dilated, and that my body was going into labor. Because I was only 20 weeks and four days, they flat out told me that my baby was not going to make it. Of course, I was beyond devastated that I'm losing my child. They sent me over to the hospital right away, and just within two hours I went from 1 cm to 3 cm. They offered to do a procedure that sews my cervix and gave me medicine to stop contractions, which I accepted. Because of the procedure, I was admitted. The next morning I was discharged. Sadly, later that day, my water broke, but was leaking slowly. I went straight to the hospital. But because my water broke, now I was admitted and considered at high risk of life-threatening infections that cannot only harm the baby, but can harm me as well. So now I'm scared because not only I can die, the baby can die and it's just a lot to think of. But I decided to stay on antibiotics and be watched very carefully every 2 to 4 hours. Every day they take blood, and not only that but stick me with another needle every 12 hours to give me blood thinner medication because I'm also at a higher risk for blood clots. I cannot explain how stressful this is and how mentally suffocating it feels. At first, I was angry with myself. What did I do? Did I do something wrong? Did I work too hard? Should I go through with this because God forbid I don't make it through this and I leave my baby girl? So it's just a battle with everything. But I just prayed and prayed and prayed and the doctors kept telling me 'You're not going to make it because you're at risk for an infection called sepsis, which was their main concern, or the baby will not make it but if you do deliver. We still can't intervene or even try and help unless you are over 23 weeks'. Man, was this hard to take in. The best thing I know to do is pray every single second I got was to pray not only to get me through this but to thank him for every minute or hour I have on the Earth with my family and my baby fighting for his life in my tummy. And guess what guys, today, August 15, I am now 23 weeks pregnant. Now they are telling me I'm going to have to stay here till 34 weeks (bedbound) unless I go into labor naturally before that or signs of infection, but now not only risk of infection but risk of blood clots and on top of that since my water had broken and is still leaking the baby has no fluid which can cause so many complications. On top of that, he is also breech. Which means I have to have a classical cesarean C-section, which is so scary. It's mind-blowing. My faith in God is very strong but I will not lie. I am so terrified and I cannot even begin to explain how draining this is. Now it's starting to hit me, like how am I going to pay my rent or my car or other bills like oh my God my daughter starts school next month. What am I going to do? Or the scariest question to myself is am I making the right choice by putting myself at risk every day. The doctors consistently remind me of me being at risk which I understand. That is their job. They have to inform me. But God, I’m just scared and tired of it all. So here I am, asking you guys for help. I don't care how small or how big the number is, anything will help and even if it's not a number, a prayer is just as strong. To my family and friends, I will continue to pray and stay strong. God is so good. He truly is so good and every time I feel a moment that I'm about to break down. I just close my eyes and I can feel him with me holding me down as he always did, and continues to do. I will be strong. Try not to worry too much and thank you for even taking the time to read this. I love you guys. God bless you.