As some of you know, I have been working hard this past year on my emotional and mental health. It's definitly a journey and not a destination, with me continuing to struggle this past year to keep my mental health in a safe place. Losing Mom, my best friend, in July led me to a relapse of my chronic major depression toward the end of the year. To make it through into 2025, I relied on some truly wonderful people at a fantastic treatment center in California, The Mental Health Center (MHC) of San Diego. They helped me find joy in life again and gave me a sense of supportive, understanding community which I had lacked. I left that program in March of this year and since then I've continued on my own to try to work the program and use the skills I learned. Some days are better than others of course but there is no denying that MHC offered me hope where I had none and lifted me up when I was down as low as could be. So when I heard recently that MHC was looking for program graduates to volunteer to tell others about the program at their booth during San Diego Pride in July, I knew I wanted very badly to be there to represent the program that helped me so much and to give back to any potential clients who might be thinking about MHC services.

There are a few other ways for me give back to others, and help myself at the same time, during a visit back to San Diego. While I'm there I'll be blessed to be able to repeat a very successful grief ritual for the MHC community that took place in March, and left many asking when we can do it again. I'll be able to speak in person at our weekly alumni meeting and community meeting. Best of all, I will be able to see so many of the friends who were so supportive of me during my time there. That includes my friends at the 1st UU Church of SD, a spiritual home away from home. If time allows I might even get in an overnight camping and hiking trip, since those are great forms of therapy too.

So I'm planning -- and asking the universe to help make it happen -- a one week return trip to San Diego next month, mid-July. Being able to afford it will be tricky. While I was lucky to have insurance to help me cover the cost of therapy, I lost several months worth of work, and that has left George and me a bit in the hole. Fortunately I have someone who will let me stay with them if I can make it there for a visit. My biggest expense will be the airfare. I'm hoping that because this goal is being lead by love, somehow I can make it happen, with the help of some friends and generous loved ones.

I know it's the most cliché thing in the world to say "I hate asking people for money" and in this case, it's true! I though of a million reasons I shouldn't set up a GoFundMe account to help me go back to California; it seems petty or selfish. Then I really thought about my motivations and realized they are neither of those things, and that this is a goal that I really do think the Universe will help me obtain. But first, I need to do my part to set myself up for success. I also wanted to stress that because this is a small and non-critical fundraiser, small donations and anonymous donations are just fine. There are plenty of GFM's out there for really heavy, life or death reasons and thank goodness this isn't one of them. Give them as much as you can. But, life isn't a contest, and if you can send $5 or $8 my way, a small donation, an anoymous donation if you'd like, that could add up to make a huge difference, the difference between me being able or not able to go back to MHC for a refresher on what's important in life: peace of mind, emotional wellbeing, and staying on the road towards mental health.

A huge thank you to all of you, for your generosity and for considering my request.

Michael La Rocca

Joliet, IL

20 June 2025