Support in a Meaningful way

(Fair WARNING: long message- grab your coffee & have a bathroom break before starting lol)

Hi, my name is Natalia... a regular shmegular girl from Washington Heights with a love for the art of Photography. I am here to tell you a little about my story & what has led to this moment. A chapter in my book of life where my heart is broken to pieces but my community has been in my corner to uplift me and put them back together. An experience that is both humbling & empowering. Words aren't enough to express my gratitude.

I have built a business around a Dream that started as soon as I became a Mommy-- 13 years ago. In that transition, I quickly realized that time waits for no one & our memories fade shortly after they are created. With every first that my son Nathaniel accomplished, my fear of missing out created a lane to capture the moment & keep it forever. As time passed, the perspective of time travel blossomed. It opened my eyes to the reality that while we are busy living life, we should be capturing it. Truly a hidden luxury we all take for granted--& just like that, my purpose was born.

Recently, I decided to start investing the same magic into my own life. (Practice what you preach right?) I started planning my "Dream" shoot. I coordinated every detail with boundless love & vision. Down to the season and being amongst my favorite trees- the Cherry Blossom. I reached out to a photographer in PA because I wanted something different. (Tired of every major park in NY lol) I had been following her for a while and loved her work so Fairmount Park in Philly here we come!

The day came, May 5th, 2023 to be exact and the session was all I ever wanted (except for the trees no longer being pink. The pedals had fallen... but we aren't going to harbor on the "small" things lol). The photographer we hired directed us with love and understood the vibe we were looking for, an amazing experience all around.

This is when the heartbreak sets in...

At the end of the session, upon returning to our car (which was literally within eyeshot) my husband & daughter walked ahead so they were the first to see that it had been broken into. There was glass shattered everywhere. My husband went into fearless protector mode and quickly made a mental note of the things that were missing. With tearful eyes he turned around & confirmed my worst nightmare in this scenario- My camera had been stolen.

So many emotions ran through my mind and heart, oddly the most prominent was gratitude. I was grateful it was just material and that my family was safe. We were honestly SO close to the car, it's a miracle we didn't see or hear anything- that could have gone left in half a second. Secondly, denial- I couldn't believe what I was seeing or hearing. My mind went to a place of maybes and different scenarios that was not what was right in front of me. The weirdest thing because I could feel myself spinning and shedding layers that made me feel seen and naked all at once. Then my mind went to blame, I blamed myself because I knew better. So many photographers have been targeted and had gone through the same thing- the thought "I should have known better" just echoed. I have been in this industry for a long time, I should have never taken it with me in the first place but I insisted.

What happened next left me speechless. In a moment of so much uncertainty, my 7-year-old baby girl held both of my hands and asked me to pray with her. I will never forget her little face looking up at mine with such poise & grace. So confident that prayer was the answer; so calm in her core that she was safe with Mommy & Daddy. Time froze as we held hands & our cosmic connection created a bubble around us that I can't explain. We prayed from a deep-rooted part of our hearts, we prayed for the fear in our bellies to be put to rest, for the gratitude we managed to feel that we were safe and we prayed that this too shall pass, we will get through this.

A sudden calm came over me and almost like a hypnosis, I began to see past our misfortune. Only God could have shown up and embraced us in that moment, this way. I instantly knew we would be ok, a hard feeling to come by given the situation.

It's no secret that my family and I have had a rough year. In February we survived a fire and are still dealing with the aftermath. A few short months later, we are confronted with THIS. Losing the one item that generated extra income to keep us afloat. What the thieves took wasn't just a camera. They stole years of hard work, a dream in fruition and the sustainability of a family who is just trying to live a quality life. They stole our moment, we were dressed up beautifully and had such a special day. This shoot was meant to celebrate the beautiful lives I have brought into the world & my husband and I turning 9 in years of marriage (est. May 7th, 2014). The taint they left on that experience could never be repaired or removed. We will forever look back at such beautiful photos as the day that our dreams were shattered.

So much of this experience has left me feeling defeated. I have my good days where I am ready to go, start anew but then the bad days remind me just how violating this all is. It's a hard pill to swallow which is why it took me so long to say anything to basically anyone. On top of it all, this theft has caused a snowball effect of financial detriment. I have an overhead to worry about that I can't take care of without producing through my photography business. A day job could only cover our basic needs and losing this extra stream of income is a huge setback.

The pieces as you can imagine are all falling apart which has led me to this moment. A moment that was always unimaginable. " I could never" seems to be fitting when I thought of ever having to set up a gofundme, yet humbly- here I am.

If there is anything this experience has taught me, it's what it truly means to surrender and the surprise of community. So many people have shown up for us & I don't know what to do with all of these emotions. My pride is the size of a gorilla so this is all new and an extremely vulnerable moment for me. I say surprise of community, not because I doubted any of you but because my mind is set to get through anything and everything on my own.

Time & time again life will teach you that you need your people, you are not meant to do it alone. As much as you fight against it, the lesson will boomerang until you get it.

I've read and listened to enough motivational, spiritual and self-help books to know better but again, sometimes it's a matter of just finally learning the lesson.

Whatever happens next is up to the universe. I have manifested my dreams more times than I could count, letting go of the reigns feels foreign but necessary. I am no longer in control and have had to surrender to my circumstances once and for all. I will continue working on staying positive, more importantly, true to myself. I feel immensely lucky to have the community of love that I do. Thank you all for showing up! Your messages and intent to be part of the tribe that can get me back behind a lens are everything. I am grateful for each and every one of you.

To my Husband & Children, I know this year has been tough on us but we will prevail. God has never failed us & has never abandoned us. We see him in the love we have received & the unwavering peace we carry in our hearts. Whatever is next will be exactly what we need to see this through. Thank you for riding this all out with such grace. Together we can overcome anything.

I love you with all of me.