Hello.

If you have been guided here from my Facebook and know my story, thank you. This will be a long read.

“Non Viable” — a label nobody wants to hear. Imagine being told at your 20-week anatomy scan your baby will either pass inside of you, or you will go into labor before 29 weeks. Straight to end-of-life care before it even begins. My daughter has no bladder, polycystic kidneys, and her lungs aren’t developing. She is stuck where she’s at, restricted movement head down and can’t even turn. I saw her trying to turn today. She couldn’t. She is being squished because of little to no amniotic fluid, and I still have to carry on like everything is normal. She has a heartbeat. I can feel every moment, every kick. I heard her heartbeat today. I saw her heart beating. She’s kicking, letting me know she’s there. But she is suffering right now. I can hear the words over and over again, that nothing can be done. That I cannot terminate here in Texas due to the laws. No surgery, no miracle. Nothing could have prevented this. I feel like my body has failed her. She has no chance. I have NO CHOICE but to sit here & think about how the next 9 weeks I will be asked the questions of “how is she?” “Congratulations” “how was your appointment?” I have to sit here and wonder when the day will come that my body just goes into labor. I have to sit here and wonder if she’s suffering even more. Wonder if her heart is even beating. Wondering if she has taken her last breath. Having to still go to appointments in two weeks, knowing it doesn’t even matter anymore. I have to hear my son ask every day when his sister will be home. I’m sure even after I could even begin to explain to him his sister will not be coming home.

My first sweet little girl. Mommy wanted you so bad. We all wanted you so bad. And I am so, so sorry.

I never thought I would be in a position to share such heartbreaking news. We are faced with unimaginable challenges and the journey ahead is filled with uncertainty. As I navigate this difficult time, I find myself needing support not just emotionally, but also financially for end-of-life services. Your kindness could help lighten this heavy load. If you're able to contribute or share this message, it would mean the world to me and my family. Thank you for being here during this challenging time

If you are unable to do so, I truly understand, and please, prayers are always welcome.