Support Flux's Journey to Stability and Community

I know that every good and excellent thing in the world stands moment by moment on the razor-edge of danger and must be fought for.

Thornton Wilder

Hello! My name is Flux - I chose that name because I kept wanting to change it, mostly as a result of the stressful situation I've found myself in as of late. I'm 24 years old, live in Seattle, and love the hell out of micro-mobility.

I didn't move to Denver by choice. The people that were housing me were both disabled and had found permanent and stable disability housing, but despite being employed as their caregiver, I wasn't qualified to move in with them. The last real day I got to spend enjoying my time with them was on my birthday, in October, and after that, it was understood that I had to be out by November 7th.

I am lucky enough that I was able to find housing and a job pretty fast, and so I decided when I moved to Denver that I was going to help as many people as possible - transgender people, disadvantaged by the circumstances of their existence - primarily. One by one, I took people in, tending to them, allowing my job stability and my unbreakable patience to carry my employment. It worked for a while - even when roommates didn't have jobs, I was making enough money to get by.

One by one, I moved people in. People from College Station and Houston, Texas. People from conservative suburbs of Denver. People from the Midwest. I took special care of these refugees - as much as I could, but learned over time that even if I could help anyone, I couldn't help anyone.

Pleasantries turned into Luxuries. Something as simple as eating out became something I had to save for. At first, demands were simple. Spending a little more on groceries here and there. Spending a little more on pizza because nobody wanted to cook. Doing dishes and chores around the house despite working 50-hour weeks. I don't think I noticed the line where demands became unreasonable; Spending $300 on someone's new phone, because she broke her old one and I was scared of how she'd react if I told her that I couldn't get one for her right away. Skipping meals to pay rent. 50 hour weeks turned into 70 hour weeks. 9 hours of sleep a day turned into 6. I kept having constant crises - the name Flux was given to me by a trusted friend because my identity kept fluctuating. Flux is still a name I use at work.

Debt collected. Little things at first - temporarily buying food, equipment I needed. Everything got so badly, so quickly. Phones. Laptops. Electric Bikes. I had to open a $3,000 credit line to pay for an apartment and a deposit, and this is only finances. This doesn't mention the time I was raped in my own bed, or the time I was cussed out by a white person for being a person of color and being better off. I'm grateful that, while seconds away from buying a used car, I realized that I was doing something wrong. I moved out of Denver that day, a month and a half before my lease was expected to end. I ran back to my parents' house, and left three of the four roommates behind - the ones that promised income and delivered too late.

I will not let this experience deter me. I still dream of taking care of queer people, but also of community in general - I'm a strong advocate of community strength in general. A post on r/Seattle I made got some attention - it's a video of me, fishing a 90 lb electric bike vertically up the side of a cliff inside of a 70 ft ravine. I'm a hard worker. I have the drive. One day, I dream, I can work at a fire station here in Seattle - In August, they plan to run trials and interviews, but I find it difficult to want to apply for a physically demanding job like that when I don't even have the privilege to eat balanced diets.

I want to take care of queer people again, too. I think, at the end of the day, things might work out. However, as they stand, I am on the edge of being able to afford to pay bills and groceries.

I will be able to be in a position to spend money on my well-being instead of having to pay the price of past trauma, if the path stays, by the end of 2026 or the start of 2027. However, debt collects, and all it takes is one missed paycheck and the house of cards I've assembled will fall flat.

I ask for your help in assisting me in paying off the debt I've used in the past to help people who took advantage of my wallet and not my roof, so that I can provide shelter to someone who takes advantage of my roof to make their own wallet.

Thank you for your time.