Support Erin and Emilee After Kate's Passing

I can’t believe that it has been a month since we lost our Kate. She was so much to so many people. She was my bonus mom and mother-in-law, as she and my mom were childhood friends and neighbors, and her son Chip was the love of my life. Our families have been connected for over 70 years. She was Mom to her children, Sparky to her grandchildren, and a fierce and loyal friend to those she loved.

She had a horrible end to last year. She lost her son on 10/19/24. We were with him when his heart finally gave out. I know my own grief was immense, but I can only imagine the pain she felt watching her child die. In the next couple of months, she saw her first birthday, Thanksgiving, Christmas, and the anniversary of her husband’s death. We saw her health decline, she lost weight, had difficulty keeping any food down, she was lethargic, and generally was unwell. We tried to get her to go to the doctor or Emergency Room. Anyone who knew Kate, knew that she was tough as nails. As a retired nurse, she was exactly how you would imagine as a patient.

On February 13, after weeks of watching her decline getting much worse and several failed attempts at getting her to agree to go to the hospital, we finally got her to go but only after she fixed herself up. We were really hopeful that this would be something that could easily be fixed and she would be fine. She was herself up to the very end. In retrospect, I think that losing Chip, and all that entailed, caused her to be afraid of going to the hospital. She even asked to be taken to a different hospital.

After a CT scan, we discovered that the many abdominal surgeries she had over the years had created adhesions and her intestines twisted in one area. In that area, the tissue had begun to die. They took her to emergency exploratory surgery where they removed that section of bowel. She was still really sick, but we at least still had some hope. While in recovery, her pressure kept dropping. They took her back into surgery to see if there were any bleeds that they missed. They didn’t find any, but decided to leave her surgically open to prevent traumatizing her body if they had to go back in. They wanted her to stabilize before they completely closed her. She spent the night in the ICU where some amazing nurses and physicians did everything they could to help her. On Valentine's morning, the doctors told us that she was in septic shock and multiorgan failure. They told us that there was nothing more they could do but keep her comfortable. Letting her go was one of the hardest things we’ve done.

Kate was so tough, but unprepared to leave this world. She had no life insurance or will. Everything, including the house and car, will have to be probated. Her daughter Erin and granddaughter Emilee, who have lived with Kate for years, are trying to save the house. In order to do that, they must pay off all her debt. The current estimate is $30,000, which may increase depending on the final hospital bills we have yet to receive. I wish there was more that I could do, but I’m hoping there are enough good souls and people who loved Kate and her family who would be willing to help us.