Support Ed Butler’s Move to Compassionate Memory Care

Help Us Move Our Dad to a Safe and Caring Home

Eight months ago, we had to make the difficult decision to move our dad into a permanent memory care facility. His dementia had progressed to the point where it was no longer safe for him to live at home. One morning, he woke up convinced he had to go to work and walked nearly five miles across Reading, from Temple to his former job at RACC. That was when we realized that as a family, we could no longer give him the level of care he needed.

Since then, he has been living in a memory care home in Pennsylvania. Sadly, during a visit in June, we found him unkempt and uncared for, his room dirty, and it was unclear when he had last showered or even brushed his teeth. As we looked more closely, we realized that his very normal dementia-related behaviors were not being understood as such. Instead of being treated as a person with dementia navigating common symptoms, our dad was often perceived as if he were willfully misbehaving or doing something wrong, almost as if he were a criminal who should have known better. This lack of understanding and dignity deeply alarmed us.

Our concerns led us to place a camera in his room, where we witnessed a nurse using her foot to nudge him awake like a dog, treating him with no respect. As the only Black resident in a facility staffed and populated entirely by white people, he has faced inhumane treatment. We filed a report with the state and immediately began searching for a better option.

What we discovered was heartbreaking: quality care homes in the U.S. are scarce, and those that exist cost far more than he can afford. In searching for alternatives, we learned about retirement and memory care facilities in Thailand. In Thai culture, caring for elders is deeply rooted, and the homes we researched specialize in dementia care with compassion, patience, and dignity. They do not rely on overmedication but instead focus on attentive, individualized care.

We found a wonderful facility in Thailand where our dad can live safely and be cared for with the dignity he deserves. But moving him there requires resources. Before he can transition to Thailand, we will need to bring him to Switzerland temporarily, and then to Thailand. He needs to have a pad of quite a bit of money (25,000USD) to ensure his long term citizenship. Between the flights, transportation, advance medication, and setup, the expenses are significant.

We are asking for support from our community to help ease the financial burden of this transition. Any amount you can give will go directly toward ensuring our dad has the safe, respectful, and loving care he needs.

Edward Butler Jr. has been a pillar in Reading for so many years, and while it will be bittersweet for him to leave the community he has been rooted in for most of his life, we believe this move is the best way to honor the person he truly is. He deserves to live with care, dignity, and humanity.

We are deeply grateful for any support you can offer to make this possible.