A little about me: My name is Canth Decided, I'm 54 years old. I am an artist and handicrafter as well as a copy editor and proofreader, and as you might have guessed by my name, I am pretty odd.
Something as basic as a bed is a vital part of anyone's good health because all of us know how it sucks to get a bad night's sleep.
This is a picture of the old futon mattress that I've slept on for the past three years or so. It has been since my husband divorced me and I fell into a deep, deep depression, even to the point of refusing a box spring in the past. The reason was not cheerful, I'm afraid.
I was in a very bad way when my husband left me, a very bad way... and in its own fashion, I clung to that old futon on the floor because deep down, I wanted it to be my grave. I went to ground in that bed for years, hoping never to wake up. Hoping my loss, my grief, my anguish would finally kill me bodily as well as spiritually.
I wanted to be on the ground, deep as I was in my pain, in the agony of all of it. Of just all of it.
But now, three years later, I am starting to heal. I am beginning to put myself back together again.
I want up. I want out. I want to sleep in a bed again.
I want to fight this depression burying me, with art, community... and with good sleep. Not consigning myself to a hard padded facsimile of a grave every night, but a proper small bed, for a woman who is fighting suicidal depression and is still managing to create art in spite of this.
I am asking for help in this for the first time. I have never done a GoFundMe before, and don't know what to say...

