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Welcome Clay!
Hi! Linden and I welcomed our sweet baby boy, Clay Albert Howard, to the world on December 26th.
A hiccup in the road
Clay was born without a fully developed GI tract. He has no rectum, so no exit path for waste. While you take that in, and think of numerous “butt jokes,” we are reminded of our gratitude for the amazing medical team at Avista caught this right away. Right after Clay was born and in our arms, they delivered the news and said we had a long road ahead. Clay was born at 12:56 am on 12/26 and was transferred to Children's Hospital in Aurora at 8 am on 12/26. I recovered from the c-section alone while Linden accompanied Clay. It was an unexpected, intense, mind-numbing time.
How do they fix that?
We were hoping for a simple fix, a hole punch maybe, but that is not the case. Instead, the repair will be done in three stages. He had surgery for the first part of this process in the NICU at Children’s when he was 2 days old on December 28th. We will be in the NICU for a little while longer for additional testing and recovery (hopefully leave around 1/7) and then have two more surgical repairs a few months down the road.
How are we coping?
Every day in the NICU is a little different, but here is the general gist of our day-to-day:
Linden, Clay, and I are staying at Children's Hospital full-time. Clay started out just on IV nutrients. After his first surgery, we were able to bottle feed him my colostrum & milk. Clay has been keeping us busy with lots of tests and scans. This issue sometimes comes with other medical challenges so they need to check everything (spine, heart, kidneys, etc)…twice!
It's a production at Children's, and there is a specialist for ALL the things. It's pretty amazing to watch…if only it wasn’t your tiny baby involved. With that said, our days are filled with nurses and doctors checking on Clay and giving us updates. Endless machines beeping, friendly people saying “hi, I’m so-and-so the “some word you can’t pronounce-ologist.” It’s emotionally exhausting, talking with different doctors and nurses every day. Good news, bad news but mostly there’s little clarity. Clay has needed IV support, a catheter, and he is struggling to keep up with feeding, so he was given a feeding tube. Some days, tubes and wires are removed, and other days, more tubes are added. I like to say, "just another day in the NICU." I am pumping away, and Linden is our advocate, rock, bottle feeder, and so much more. Layered on top of this is bone crushing exhaustion mixed with moments of awe at our beautiful boy.
Our current mantras/goals/wins:
- Linden and I love the artist Fred Again, a DJ who creates mixes with lyrics from daily life. We needed Clay to have an energy boost during a feeding, so we transitioned from our typical classical music to some EDM. In the song Marea, we heard, "if we can make it through these next 6 months, what comes next is... marvelous." Linden and I were dancing in the NICU feeding our baby and looked up at each other knowing this was going to be our mantra. Our next 6 months are going to be long, but we’re so hopeful for what’s ahead. God continues to answer our prayers
- On your next commute or when you’re grinding on chores, listen to this song. Hopefully, it makes you laugh thinking of our family of three dancing in the NICU.
- We are focusing on short-term goals. For now our goal is taking Clay home.
- In the win category, the latest testing on Clay's kidneys was better than expected!
- Another victory is Clay is practicing breastfeeding! We had to start with bottles to measure each feed. We are making a slow transition to breastfeeding.
What do we need?
Many of you have asked how you can help. We are so grateful for your offers and we were reluctant to add financial help to the list. But the weight of the incoming expenses is a stress we can’t ignore. It’s no surprise that the incredible specialized care Clay requires comes at a significant cost. Nobody plans for the term “million dollar baby” to refer to their medical expenses, but that is our reality. Even with two good jobs and insurance, this is a massive debt. We are raising money for the surgeries to come, our NICU stay, and since Clay was born in 2025, a second unexpected significant insurance deductible.
Whether you donate or not, we need prayers, texts of support, and a hopeful mindset from everyone in our circle.
Our family has a long journey ahead and are beyond grateful for any support, whether that is financially or through prayers.
Thank you SO much for your support and donations. We can’t wait for you to meet Clay.
With love,
Maria, Linden, and baby Clay