After years of medical issues, surgeries, and complications, Andee was recently informed by her husband that he hasn't viewed her as his spouse since she became physically & financially unable to be as involved in their life as she previously had been. Andee is now forced to find a way forward on her own, although she is unemployed and severely medically compromised.

At this time, Andee is not medically able to return to work. Her providers don't feel she is physically able to do so at this time, despite months of work in physical therapy to gain a functional level of strength, stamina, and mobility. Andee averages 5 medical appointments/week to help her manage double joint replacement, fibromyalgia, C-PTSD, neuropathy, narcolepsy, ADHD, autism, and hemiplegic migraines. Many of these conditions developed, or were made worse, by her spouse's adamance that they have a child.

Andee's fertility journey was a rough one, even though they were able to conceive via IVF. She struggled with numerous complications during her pregnancy and was given a 5% chance of both Andee and the baby surviving. Ultimately, Andee ended up on 18 weeks full bed rest, including 4 weeks' early admission to the hospital, and a premature delivery via C-section when it was no longer safe to continue the pregnancy. Their baby spent time in the NICU with multiple complications while Andee was trying to navigate her own post-delivery complications and debilitating post-partum depression. Andee was juggling all of this, while trying to find a new job after being terminated for taking a medically-extended maternity leave after refusing to allow her the option to work remotely while on bed rest. Eventually, these complications led to a septic infection and emergency hysterectomy in 2019. Andee's spouse was largely absent during this intensely stressful time, including skipping every prenatal visit except the ultrasound, which she begged him to attend.

Andee also has two total hip replacements (R initial 2016, R revision mid-2018, L initial late 2018). The initial right hip replacement brought with it a surgically-introduced infection that spread slowly through her bone and caused Andee pain, mobility challenges, and fatigue, culminating in a septic pelvic fracture and failure of her implant during July 2023. She has had 4 surgeries since then to eradicate the infection, replace the failed implant, repair a failed surgical incision, and then repair the accidentally cut sciatic nerve that left her in debilitating pain for the 4 months it took her to be evaluated & scheduled with a plastic surgeon who specializes in orthopedic reconstruction for the necessary repair. Again, Andee's spouse was absent from most of these medical appointments and admissions, like he had been during her 30 surgeries during the 2010s.

In addition to her own recovery, Andee has also been the primary contact for all of their now-7 yo child's medical care. In addition to addressing the challenges that come with a premature baby, their child has recently been diagnosed with ADHD and autism. Both ADHD & autism have many known co-morbidities, many of which are exacerbated by their premature delivery. The recent recommendations from their medical team include starting their child in physical therapy, occupational therapy, speech therapy, behavioral therapy, visual therapy, and medication. Their recent assessments also showed above-average intelligence, which adds a level of difficulty to accommodating their needs. Andee has spent this school year advocating for their child's needs to be met at their current school and has recently learned that their school does not provide services at the needed level of care. Andee has been working to determine what school would be best for their child, while their father has been conspicuously absent from the process. Andee is now working to find a school that will best meet their child's needs, while their father refuses to consider educational options other than his alma mater. Andee's husband has actively worked against Andee's attempts to make sure their child's medical needs are met, denying their necessity and even refusing to administer the child's medication as prescribed.

Despite his announcement that their marriage was over, Andee's husband took no action to certify this legally, until Andee was forced to take action and retain an attorney. He responded by revoking her access to all of their accounts & credit cards, leaving her with no way to purchase their child food after that day's medical appointment. He has also disputed the charge on their credit card where Andee retained her attorney.

After Andee retained an attorney, she filed for divorce. Her husband knew of the filing the morning it happened, went to the courthouse to obtain a copy of the papers, but refuses to sign for them; he has continued to dodge service for weeks. This is a sign to her attorney that Andee's husband is determined to drag out the proceedings as long as possible.

This GoFundMe will help Andee in the following ways:

1 - allow Andee to secure a place to live for her and their child (pursuant to any custody rulings that may come in the future)

2 - enable Andee to secure an attorney to represent her best interests in the divorce (should the disputed charge be overturned)

3 - enable Andee to retain a guardian ad litem to represent their child's best interests in the divorce

4 - give Andee financial support as the divorce proceeds, as she cannot receive disability benefits while she is legally married due to her spouse's income level

5 - allow Andee the space to plan her future without the stress of new daily incidents of negligent or active abuse

Thank you for reading and contributing as you can! Andee is a very giving person, both of her time and energy as well as what resources she has. Andee deserves so much better than she has gotten in the last 15 years and I hope we can show her we are here for her!