Hello guys, I'm a 45 year old man from a toxic masculine family from the islands. Came to America at the young age of 17 and I've had many struggles but one of my mainstays of always keeping me focus and humbled has been work. That's the American dream you work for it you can get it. And I did for awhile but the winter's were destroying me physicaly I couldn't do it any more. So i decided to moved from the east coast to the west coast for a different mindset and new start. I've always been in the health and fitness industry. I got burned out and got into the security guard or better known as the rent a cop industry. Surprisingly I actually liked it alot but little did I know i was walking into another toxic hyper masculine environment. I followed protocol but once I started showing that i needed help with my mental health journey. I was turned into a Leeper. My company lost its contract and I decided to not stay with them any longer. Not gonna say which one they're pretty big. And now I'm being black listed by said company. It's been 3 months now and no one would touch me. No matter what company I applied for that would normally be glad to hire me is not even giving me the time of day. I am at my witts end I'm even applying for jobs just to make ends meet and still getting turned. And now dealing with a mental issue that I just found out is a family trait. All my bills are piling up, I'm about to lose my car and most likely get kicked out of my apartment. And it isn't like back in the days where you can walk in and they see you, they see that drive and determination of you wanting to work hard at what ever they throw at you. You're willing and able and someone that would be enough for them to you hire you. And trust me my resume is good. But Everything is online now. So being in my room with no money and not even being looked at for work. It's taking me to a dark place. I've been told in life close mouths down get fed, I'm just trying to pay my bills stay afloat until, God willing someone hire me so I can get back on my feet and get more stability in my life on all levels. I know this is a shot out in the dark but I wanna atleast try all avenues before I give up and crawl back to my family that's just waiting to say I told you so. I still have faith in the human condition. Cause Christ knows I'm trying out here not to depend on people or do anything illegal to get these bills/life taken care of. Until I get back on my feet. If anyone can honestly find it in their heart to help a brother out, I'm happy with 25 cents, something is better than nothing, I'll take it. And if it's higher than that, I'll even show you what you're money is being used for to keep my head above water so I don't drown. Thank you so much for listening and I hope this request for help, meets you and your family in mindsets and spirits.