Hi, my name is Matt (why do I have to start with that? Feels weird). Anyhoo, a couple of days before my birthday my life kind of imploded when I was asked for a divorce. I understand my wife's reasonings and wish I had a chance to fix things but clearly this is something that had been on her mind for a while. Well, I say "clearly" but "clearly" it wasn't given it felt like a sucker punch that knocked me on my butt. Then, when down and writhing around in pain, a bus came along and trundled over me. Barely alive, the vultures then swooped down and pecked at my body before a kindly tramp shooed them away... But only because he wanted to use me as a toilet. So, yeah, I guess it wasn't "clear" at all until she said she wanted a divorce. Still, her mind is made up and I respect her wishes and I hope she finds what she is looking for in life as upsetting as that is to think of.

This sudden change has left me in a rather awkward predicament though and I hate that I am having to do this. However, with no access to credit, no savings behind me and my ill health stopping me from earning in my part-time job (I have a full-time job too but live month to month pretty much) - I cannot afford to pick up the pieces and move on.

But what does "moving on" look like? At the moment she wishes to co-habit. How long this will last I do not know but given we only have furniture in the one-room that we're no longer sharing - it has made things uncomfortable for me. Neither of us are in a position to find somewhere else to live and, even if I was, I have the added weight of my cat and dog which I simply refuse to give up. I've lost my wife, I'm not losing my best friends too. I can't.

We have a spare room here but it was always a "dumping room" - her gym gear in there, a bit of a carpet with underlay and grips exposed, mouldy walls and a broken door. All I can do right now is empty the room out and try and make it live-able - however this is proving to be out of my reach financially.

I've managed to get some cheap paint and an off-cut carpet but I can't afford the furniture required to give me my own space - which is why I am asking for help. But this isn't just a "now" fix either: If I can do the room properly then it means I can offer it out as a "room to rent" when she does decide to move out in order to help cover my monthly bills when I find myself alone in here (I won't be able to afford this rented property without doing so and I would struggle finding somewhere else for this price (we get a very good rate) that would accept the pets too.

Making the room good now gives me some level of comfort while future-proofing the inevitable so - small double bed, mattress, new sheets, duvet, a couple of wardrobes and a desk to work from.

The thing is, I know times are hard for everyone and I am, frankly, embarrassed to be here at this stage of my life and asking for help so I have also set-up a sale on my online bookstore where people can purchase my work at a discounted rate and "get something" for their money which would still help me out. The store can be found here and the code for 10% off is HELP.

Even if you're unable to help, it would mean the world to me if you could at least share this post so I can try and pick up the pieces again.

Thank you for reading.