I’m Becca raising funds for my friend who is like family to me. Her name is Sierra who is an amazing young woman. She and her boyfriend were living a happy and vibrant life together in Colorado building their future. When Friday, her boyfriend who was an active military member passed unexpectedly.

These funds are being raised to help her cover the bills for the apartment where they live(d) and utilities while she tries to grieve, heal, and figure out a new plan for where she goes after this tragic loss.

Any amount of donation will be truly appreciated.

Venmo: @sskye3

Cash App: $sskyeequine

Here is a writing from Sierra she wrote for Cruz:

You always hated goodbyes, so I'll say until I see you again, my love.

My partner, my best friend, my whole world. I could speak about you for a thousand years and still not have said enough. I love you Cruz, and I'll miss you every minute of every day until the time comes when I'll get to see you again.

Through the pain of this my mind is still filled with the most beautiful moments we shared together over the past 11 months. It breaks my fucking heart we won't get to celebrate a full year together, but I cherish the time we had. It's still incomprehensible that all the plans we had this month have just stopped. Every year we'd been planning, every experience, big and small... All turned from plans and goals, to a fading, untouchable dream.

I never liked planning for the future, it always felt so far off and unattainable. You changed that for me with every promise of tomorrow, next week, a year from now, and 60 years in the future. You showed me the beauty that could be found in planning ahead, and even when it scared me you were always right there to reassure me. I got so comfortable with the future, only because I knew you'd be right there with me. I was so blessed to have you in the past, present, and future, and although that is gone now I still feel so greatful for the time we did have together.

I had to rewrite every sentence of this farewell because I couldn't stay in the past tense. I watched every moment of you leaving, and I still can't wrap my head around you being gone.

You're the first thing I see when I open my eyes in the morning, and the last when I finally close them at night to sleep. I see you in my dreams, and I feel your arms wrap around me when im awake and standing still, pulling me into a gentle hug. I hear you singing your favorite songs to me, and I see the smile you get when you've finally played them enough times that I can sing some of it with you. The only difference now is these things all play as a distant recording, a vivid memory that gets further away the longer I try to stay in it. How can I just accept you're in my past, when we were both so ready for our future?

Losing you was so unexpected, I wish I could have done anything different. I wish I would have seen where you were in that moment, even one second sooner so I could tell you how much I love you just one more time. I didn't see any of this coming, and I feel so guilty because of that. The future was bullshit, and the past was already gone. You were the only thing that mattered, and it hurts so deeply knowing you couldn't feel that.

I miss everything about you. The way your smell filled the whole house as soon as you'd walk through the door. The love and passion we shared for each other, and the way the whole world would fade away when we were together. I miss the little notes and drawings we'd hide for each other. I miss slow dancing in the kitchen while we waited for our food to be ready. I miss your piles of laundry thrown about in every room when there was a perfectly good and empty hamper just waiting to be used. I miss tripping over the shoes you'd hurriedly take off and throw in any direction because you were just so excited to get in bed and cuddle after a long day.

Im gonna miss the late night cleaning, both of us exhausted and wishing we could just be asleep already, but we'd do it anyways because it was the only hour that we could do it together. I miss coming home to you when you had the day off and walking through the front door to hear you'd spent the whole day cleaning, just because it would make me smile. I'll miss the quick grin I'd try to hide from you, because I knew the bathroom sink would still be covered in the little beard hairs you'd trimmed 3 days ago, and that I'd be cleaning them up later that night when you weren't paying attention.

I reminisce over the look you'd give me when I'd say I'd make one of your favorite foods. Even when it meant spending 2+ days cooking something I knew would be gone before the stove cooled down, it was always worth it to see the excitement in your eye for just one more second.

Kissing and dancing in the rain, skipping through cross walks hand in hand just to make ourselves laugh, Giggling uncontrollably because one of us had cold feet when we got into bed and the other was about to find out just how cold they are. All of these beautiful memories and so many more play in my head on repeat, and I can't believe that is where they are limited to now.

We both had big goals that required big sacrifices like having opposite schedules that left minimal time for us to just be together with nothing else holding our attention. It was so worth it when we were doing it for our best possible future together, but now that you're gone I wish I could have spent every one of those wasted seconds with you instead, making those memories I cherish so dearly. You were the most important part of what drove me to get up every day, and be just a little bit better.

We both made mistakes and fucked up things we wish we hadn't, but we always held forgiveness for each other because we knew all we wanted was to be the best partners we could be. We wanted to feel nothing but peace, love, happiness, and warmth from each other, and we worked everyday to overcome every challenge we'd be faced with, to learn, grow, and improve so we could achieve that.

You showed me love and happiness like I'd never known it before, and will never know it again. Cruz, my dear, you were my person, my soulmate, and my one true love. I will never find another like you, so I will wait and wait until I find you again.

Cruz was the strongest person I knew. He was so brave and determined. He had the most brilliant and complex mind. He was so fierce and full of fire, and he could still be so gentle and tender. He felt every emotion deep into the core of his being, and I strive everyday to be half the person he was.

If there is anything we can all learn from Cruz, let it be this. Tell your people you love them, everytime you feel it. Hug each other just a little tighter and longer, before you lose the opportunity to do it at all. Be unapologetically yourself and let the people who don't accept you for who you are fuck right off. Love deeper, feel your emotions strongly, and don't shy from the fear of being vulnerable.

I love you Cruz, with every fiber of my being. I will suffer this life without you, only because I know you'd want me to, and you'll be waiting for me with open arms when it's over. Until I see you again, my love..