Hello beautiful community,

I appreciate you taking the time to read.

My name is Shannon (they/them) and I am a white, queer, trans masculine non-binary person living in the Bay Area.

I acknowledge the space I take as someone who embodies intersecting identities that hold power, privilege, and access to healthcare, education, and support. I am able to be here, with my queer and trans/NB identities because of Black and Brown Trans and Gender Non-Conforming people who have led and continue to lead LGBTQ+ liberation movements. Marsha P. Johnson, Zazu Nova, Silvia Rivera, and so many others have been at the forefront of LGBTQ+ Civil Rights movements and this history, these facts, are not lost on me. It is because of their fight, I can be here, writing this today.

And yet there are deep rooted systems of oppression that do not allow folks in my community to live life fully and free, in their affirmed gender and sexual identities.. Queer, Trans, Black, Indigenous, People of Color (QTBIPOC) continue to face higher rates of health disparities, discrimination, harassment, assault, and death due to White Supremacy and the systems, attitudes and beliefs of heterosexism, transphobia, patriarchy, homophobia, xenophobia, misogyny, etc. that uphold it. We must continue to center QTBIPOC voices, experiences, and lives when discussing and embarking on our journeys toward life saving gender affirming medical care. And it's with humility & deep gratitude that I sit with these truths and encourage you (especially my white and cisgendered community) to do so as well, so that we can support QTBIPOC folks, whether that is with our time, money, and/or energy. And lastly, it’s while holding space for these truths that I also try to hold space for myself, within this consciousness of my whiteness and white privilege and within the commitment to do the work, to do better, and to hold myself and you accountable.

So, where do we go from here? Do I start at the beginning or this present moment? My survival instinct is to start at the beginning in the hopes that people would better “understand” me. That if I did so, who I am would “make sense” to them. And this being my instinct is because I have had to do so many times, to show that I am “non-binary” or “queer” enough. Yet this is harmful. And has been harmful on top of the gender dysphoria I experience on a daily basis. I share this to let you in on what goes on for me.

When I first came out as Non-Binary, I wrote this instagram post:

“It’s taken me months, days and years to figure out how to say this.

And not for myself but for you. And imagine that. Imagine carrying around that weight. As if I needed to filter my speech and make sure those of you reading feel good about it. And the reality is, we’ve all spent far too long tripping over, hiding, and disappearing our own words to make the other feel better. And what’s real is that i’ve spent most of my life doing that too.

But today is different.

And in this moment I’m going to say what I want without fear. And in this moment I’m going to let go of the ways in which my mind will want to wander about what you will think, what you will say, what you will ask, and what you will feel.

Yet I will say it anyway.

And I will say it without feeling the need to take care of you not because I don’t care but because we all deserve to be held in tender moments like these. Without question. Without making it about you.

So, here is my,

I am Non-Binary,

My pronouns are they/them speech.”

I’m here. I’m Queer. I am a Trans Masc/Non-Binary person with a deep desire and longing to live my life in my affirmed body and gender. Sometimes I get at myself for “taking so long” to get to this moment. Like, why couldn’t I have figured this out at a younger age. Yet when my mind wants to criticize my path, I work to remind myself of all the lessons and growth that occur during the in-between moments and seasons and all of the growth that is still to come. While my gender journey isn’t much different from other folks in the Trans/Non-Binary community, it is mine and if there is one thing I have learned through this journey, it is that my voice and experience is valid; it’s worth sharing. And because of that, living my life, in my affirmed body and gender is not only valid but vital.

Although an individual does not need to experience Gender Dysphoria to have access to gender affirming medical care, dysphoria has been part of my personal experience and gender journey. Top surgery will be instrumental in reducing the dysphoria I have with my body, which will have a positive impact on my mental health, well-being, and the confidence to show up in the world as I am. While I am privileged to have health insurance with partial coverage of this procedure, this is an expensive surgery that also involves extensive recovery and time away from work. Unfortunately, I cannot cover all of this on my own and am humbled to ask my community for any support at this time, whether that be kind words, positive energy sent my way or funds. Anything is appreciated, deeply.

Thank you for being here, for taking the time to read and support me in stepping even further into my authentic self. Thank you for holding me in this tender moment.

Much love,

Shannon

**My surgery date is scheduled for December 12, 2023 with Dr. Mosser at the Gender Confirmation Center in San Francisco.