Well it's me 21st, another month has gone by and I seem to be falling further and further behind on my bills. Car repairs have taken my entire savings again, and I can't pay rent on the 5th. I've tried to Uber but it's only damaged my car to the point I can barely drive it, and have trouble getting back and forth to my job. I feel like I've reached my limit and asking for help is pointless. If anyone can assist me I would appreciate it. I'll need to rehome my pets, which is my main concern right now, if anyone would like a kitty. They are all very very sweet, the kittens are only about 10 months old. I hope you are all having a blessed day and a good holiday weekend. You are loved.

It's April 15th, it's been a little more than a month since we lost Robert. Every single day hurts and it will be a long long time before I stop missing him. I still send him texts. I hope he knows I love him.

I have a lot of people to lean on, and I really didn't think I had this many. It's been overwhelming how many people loved Robert, and how many care about me. I'm surviving month to month but I'm surviving. Thank you to everyone who has helped, even if it was just letting me cluster text them with my insanity.

I intend to put together some of Roberts writings, he has many journals with his thoughts on life and religion, and I find them fastening.. though a little hard to read without crying. I want to share some of these things and plan to post them on facebook when I can emotionally handle it.

Thank you, again, for being on my team.

Update: on March 10th at 1:20 p.m. Robert Brandum passed away in the hospital after fighting for his life for two and a half weeks. Losing my very best friend is devastating. He was loved by so many people and so many people have told me how much he will be missed. There are some final expenses that need to be covered, and his pets will have to be cared for. I do have a job and a side gig but I will be looking for more work in the coming week. Things will be hard for me, our life was built for two. I have to cancel some services and change how I live, my budget will change. I do not have a buffer for that change, the car repairs and trips for this illness have taken every penny I had. If you are able please consider donating, the money is to cover bills that would normally be covered by my brothers accounts in the next month possibly 2 as I adjust my household and my budget. Make no mistake, I'm a survivor and I will keep going, so f you can't help just pray for me.... Or just text me and tell me I have to keep going cuz I need the motivation!

There are a lot of people I want to thank, life has been chaotic for some time but Roberts family have been immeasurably kind and supportive through all of this, his brother Charles was checking on Robert daily and passing out info to his other brother Jimmy and friends. Robert has sisters, Marquesa and Stephanie, who called often and where there to lend an ear. Even Robert's childhood friends where with us through the whole ordeal, and I am so grateful, more than I can express, to Robert's family and close friends. You are so very loved.

Robert was so lucky to have his family, and his closest friends, who have been there for Robert over the years like Sharon and Darren in the entire kemetic reform group. Robert's religion was the main aspect of his life. He prayed daily, prayed for his friends, out loud and unashamed. His religious group was very important and Sharon and Darren were probably the most important people in his life. Thank you to the group for holding him in their prayers.

Robert was part of a very large group called Rescuing Snow White and people in that group were always so good to him. He loved those people and talk to them daily, Robert has always been a cat person, he even took on the name Leon the Lion for many years and my kid still calls him uncle Leo from time to time. Robert has several kitties and they are all being loved as much as I can. I know they're feeling the loss.

Robert went to physical therapy weekly and he loved the therapists at Grace rehab. He was always happy when he was there. Thank you for the team at Grace rehab for always making my brother feel important and making him smile.

Robert was lucky to have some very good friends in life. They are grieving with me, and know how much I love them. Robert fought hard to be able to climb stairs to be with his people. I hope everyone knows how much you love them.

If you can donate I would be grateful. Either way, please remember my robert, remember what a good person he was, how kind he was, how much love he shared. Don't forget him.

________________________________

When Robert had his stroke 9 years ago he lost a lot of function in the right side of his body. Being that he was still in his thirties it was not easy for him to be in a nursing home and honestly I couldn't watch him be there. It was not a good place for a young man and he was completely unaffected mentally by his stroke so he understood exactly where he was. So we brought him home and for several years now he and I have shared a home, a little two bedroom house on a little hill with a nice view and a lot of good neighbors. Robert is my best friend and I want to do everything I can to take care of him. So he and I have figured out how to deal with his medical needs. And for the last few years he's been going to monthly appointments for cardiology and nephrology, he has a foot doctor and a vein doctor, he does physical therapy twice a week and swims on Wednesdays. We've done well in the Summers and he goes out and naps in the yard, we go to the in-door and out-door pools, Cove Lake and Norris Dame with our pets and we go up to Baker's Forge so we can see the entire valley for miles and miles and enjoy the breeze. We have good friends and spent Halloween and Thanksgiving with some of them. But it's been harder the last year or so, He has several chronic health issues that we have learned to manage. On February 12th, Robert had his first ever seizure. I was present and called 911 immediately. He was takin to our local ER and then to another hospital with a neurological department. He spent four days in the hospital and was released with orders to see his primary. His primary informed us that his kidney function had plummeted to 11% and his kidney doctor instructed us to visit the next morning to begin the process of setting him up on dialysis.

On Thursday morning on the way to that first dialysis appointment, Robert was weak getting into the vehicle and it quickly became apparent that he was losing his mental faculties, unable to remember his siblings names his pets names or even my name. I took him immediately to the er. 4 minutes away. He was already in the vehicle and the ambulance would have taken far longer. Once there, it was determined that his kidney function was dangerously low, below the 11% function of the day before, and he was sedated and intubated, as his breathing was not up to a good standard. While tests were being performed, he was quickly moved to another hospital with a kidney center and a well-equipped icu.

From that point on Robert has been unconscious and in the ICU. It happened very quickly and I'm still figuring out how to deal with the situation but I have a lot of people around me giving me advice.

One of the points of advice is that I should start a go fund me. The cost of traveling back and forth to the hospital, nights spent at the hospital and meals bought, gas and car repairs is starting to pile up and is going to be overwhelming very quickly.

The goal is to make him well enough to come home but this may take up to a year. Dialysis is not a small procedure and he has to heal for months and months before he is on a stable schedule and able to come home.

We are lucky. Robert has excellent insurance and he'll be taken care of. And the goal is for his home to be here and ready for him when he's ready to come home.

But to be there I need a working vehicle. I just need a little help doing that. Once I have a functioning vehicle I can take on an extra job, and Uber on the side, and my financial situation will drastically improve but that little hiccup has kept me down, and made our lives a lot harder than they need to be. If you're able to help with those repairs and travel costs it would be greatly appreciated. Robert will need a lot of support in the coming months, and I intend to be there to keep him motivated! We've done this before and we can do it again.

Prayers are good, too. My brother is a very spiritual man and he prays for his friends constantly. He's part of an amazing religious group that meets on Friday evenings and live chat and video, he has lots of people there he loves and he's part of several groups for his religion and of course for cats as he is definitely a disciple of Bast. And because of the situation, I've been lighting his candles and saying his prayers for him. I'm not sure if that's how it works but I'm trying! So if you can pray for Robert, that he recovers quickly and can come home quickly, I thank you and love you for it.

Robert has a great support group and his siblings are amazing people. He's lucky to have so many people who love him. And I'm lucky to have so many brains to bounce this issue off of, we've come up with a lot of information that might help in his recovery. I love you all, thank you.