Hi Everyone! Thank you for taking the time to read and share this fundraiser.
My name is Ryan and my partner Cindy and I are going through a really rough time...we never imagined being in this place, but we are here and we need help.
I have been in the hospital since late October of 2014. I had developed MRSA...pronounced mersa, an infection that rejects most antibiotics, and Fourniers Gangrene which got into my blood stream and I was septic. I would have died if Cindy and my Mom did not call 911.
It all started when I fell in August 2014, a really bad sprain in my left knee and my sciatic nerve was on fire in my right leg.....I could not even walk, it was so painful...I needed a walker to get up and move around. I was pretty much bed ridden for three months.
Cindy and I have been self employed for the last 11 years running a small boutique niche website. When I ended up in the ICU and intubated for 3 weeks and the doctors began to caution Cindy and my family that I might not make it, and if I did...brain damage was likely....right before the busy Christmas time with large medical bills adding up quickly and no cash flow coming in...we were worried about paying the rent. We had no money to keep the business running so basically the hard decision to shut it down was made for us. It weighed heavy on our hearts but we had to trust that focusing on my health and getting better...and that opportunites will present themselves when the time is right. I woke up and came out of being under right before this past Thanksgiving....losing a whole month, being out and not able to remember anything about that time is pretty spooky. The fact that I came out of the ICU ok is a real miracle, I know that I was being taken care of, thank you God.
I am in a wound care facility now and the plan is for me to go to an intensive inpatient rehab to build up my strength and gain my mobility back once my wound from removing the Gangrene is healed. The wound care doctor is very happy with the healing so far, but there is a ways to go and it is going to be several more months at least before the wound is completely healed and that it will be very sensitive for a year or so.
Cindy has been working very hard behind the scenes for the last several months trying to manage our finances, battling with insurance people...it has been a lot for her to handle, but she has been a real champ. Last week she was up on a chair trying to get something down from on top of the kitchen cupboard and she fell and broke her left shoulder in 3 places. Oh my gosh, we both cried and laughed...when it rains it pours. Cindy is working with a specialty shoulder Orthopedic doctor and is doing her best, but it is very, very painful. The doctors are saying that these types of fractures are extremely difficult to treat. And the reality is that with my healing process I will be in one hospital or another for several more months possibly a full year...it is going to be a real struggle for us.
Unfortunately it is going to be a while before I can get back to some sort of work and begin earning and contributing to support our family, which has always been ultra important to me and much of where my own sense of self and esteem has come from...I am a hard worker and I can get things done, but I am on the sidelines now and need help.
Cindy and I have always been generous and are always doing our best to help people, whether it has been money, some good home cooked healthy food or just helping someone to smile and keep believing and staying hopeful. We would both be so incredibly grateful for your help to allow us to be able to continue recovering and getting our feet back under us. Both of our recoveries are going to take some time and some days it is difficult to be patient and trust that everything will be ok, it has been really scary for Cindy and I, but our faith is stronger than the fear. It is awkward, really awkward to be asking for help, asking for money from people we do not know and probaby never meet....but we did not see this coming and we are in a real tough spot and we need help. If you are able to help us, thank you. If you feel comfortable sharing this around with your friends and family, every gift no matter the amount adds up and will really be helpful for us as we continue navigating our way through this storm.
Every morning I pray not to give into the fears that creep in throughout the day. My anxiety is high as I move forward, wondering if I will ever walk again. The Doctors are hopeful but can't say for sure. The "unknown" is very scary. Then I see Cindy. Her positive, grateful attitude is contageous. Unbelievably, she was in a terrible accident several years ago where her family was told definatively that she would never walk again. Yet here she is each morning bouncing and smiling around the room. She is an inspiration to me, my best friend. Of course she was able to stay day and night in the primary care hospital we were in when I was in TLC but we are more than grateful that the accute care hospital we are in now has gone above and beyond to make accomodations for Cindy to stay here many days each week. It is some distance from our home and they know that support is a huge part of recovery. We are a team. We have always been there to support each other. So as we go forward, holding hands she reminds me of all the times she has leaned on me, and now, it is okay, it is my time to lean. She reminds me that all we have is today, to stay in the moment, to concentrate on all the good things. Good things... there are many. We have a lot to be grateful for.
Thank you so much for reading my story and supporting me.