Russo Family Resource Fund for End of Life Care

Hello my friends,

Some of you know me, my name is Jennifer Russo, and some of you know my husband Charlie, but I don't know if many of you know that we need help, or know the extent of the need.

In 1992, I married the most wonderful man. Charlie was smart, kind, and funny, he sang and told great stories. We built a beautiful life, we had a child, and for a long time I felt that everything was possible.

In August of 2018 Charlie had a cerebrovascular accident, CVA. He suddenly became vey dizzy, almost falling, and holding on to the walls. We learned that it was a TIA, a transient ischemic attack, or small stroke, which led to brain damage. He has had at least four of these events, over time. His balance and mobility are greatly reduced.

I had always thought if we needed medical care, we could get it. We bought health insurance for years, saw doctors regularly, and I never imagined something could happen where we would be on our own. In August of 2019 he received a diagnosis of Reversible Cerebral Vasoconstrictor Syndrome as the cause of the strokes. Charlie continued to decline, and it has become clear that he will not get better. I am told it is not an exact science, and there is nothing that can be done.

I had been laid off within months of his initial stroke, and then again at the start of the pandemic. In November 2021 I hit rock bottom. I was swamped with depression and consumed by grief. Our savings were spent, Charlie was slowly disappearing, and now nothing was possible. I called the crisis clinic and described all the ways I had considered to end my life. Since then, I have been receiving treatment, medication and therapy, and I am learning to ask for help and learning how to accept help.

In April of this year, Charlie spent six days in hospital. He received new diagnoses of congestive heart failure and atrial flutter, and lost 30 pounds. He signed a DNR order, which is posted in my kitchen, and was discharged to hospice. Current guidelines make hospice available if end of life is foreseeable in six months. In May, he was discharged from hospice. I don't know how long we will be on this journey. I have had to learn to live with a certain amount of uncertainty.

Charlie fell in the early morning of June 20, 2023, getting up for the bathroom. He hit his head on the granite countertop and landed on the tile floor. I called 911. With his new blood thinner, there was so much blood. The paramedics helped me get him into the car and I drove him to the ER for eleven stiches.

After the fall, Charlie has needed more care. He was a wonderful dancer before the strokes. Now we have a system where I cup his elbows while he hold onto my arms, and I walk backward while he walks forward. I help him with dressing and with showering, I serve his food and dole out his medication. Most of his vision is gone.

I miss Charlie's big laugh. He has a small voice now. He will answer questions but does not really converse. I miss him and I am frightened. I asked for a re-eval from hospice, and they have declined to accept him. He sleeps most of the time now, about ten hours at night and six to eight during the day. He is up for dinner and listens to tv, and then he goes back to sleep.

It's been hard to plan. We have no income aside from his social security benefit. I have gained some debt from expenses like a water heater failure and brakes for the car. Medicare covers most of the medical costs, but we will soon be in the "doughnut hole" and will lose some assistance on his medications. I am doing my best to cut costs while managing the household, and managing my grief and mental health. I recognize that I need to live through this.

More than ever, I feel that I need to be here. Charlie needs care. I cannot work outside the home, he has brain damage and cannot see. I want to be the one to care for him. My goal is to keep him safe: no pain and no fear. I want to lift him up so that when he is ready, he can peacefully let go.

For this fundraising effort, I hope to raise $10,000.00.

This amount would mainly cover:

$ 2,300 second-half 2023 property taxes

$ 1,050 three-month maintenance on home equity debt

$ 500 three-month winter utilities (electric heat)

$ 750 two-month supply of blood thinner at 70% (doughnut hole)

$ 3,000 pay down credit card debt

$ 1,000 resource fund for future unknowns

$ 1,000 eventual cremation expense

Any funds above these targets would pay for next year's home insurance, car insurance, and debt maintenance. I appreciate your consideration of this request.

Thank you.

look at that salmon!

look at the happy salmon fisherman!

proud dad

the wedding

the wedding cake

the wedding cake agreement