Rehab Costs For Brandon Purcell

I’ve tried to find the best way to put this into words. I’ve sat here staring at a blank screen forever. Wondering if I should post this or not. I feel like more people in the world need to put themselves into other peoples shoes and realize we all are different. That we all don’t handle things the same way that everyone else does. I’ve stayed silent to long. I keep my life very private not because I’m afraid of what people think but because I know most people don’t understand. But I am in love with an ADDICT. There I said it. I’m deeply in love with an addict. If you are lucky enough to NOT understand addiction then good for you. I hope you never have to. I hope you never have to see someone you love disappear before your eyes, while standing right in front of you. I hope you never have to lie awake at night hoping the phone doesn’t ring, yet hope it does at the same time. I hope you never know the feeling of doing everything you thought was right and still watch everything go wrong. I hope you never know what it means to live afraid of yourself, to never trust yourself to fight a raging war inside your own mind every moment to feel unwanted and unworthy to need something that you know is destroying you and to do anything for it. To trade yourself, your life, your soul and still end up broken and alone. To give away everything and everyone you had to have no answers to always question. To have no choice yet to have a choice to fight your battle. That’s what it’s like to BE a ADDICT. Until you heal the wounds of your past you will bleed. Addicts bandage the bleeding with drugs, alcohol whatever numbs that pain. Eventually thought that blood will ooze through and will stain your life. They have to find the strength to open the wound stick their hands inside and grab the core of the pain that’s holding them back, grab the past, grab those bad memories and make peace with them. I’m sitting here on my bedroom floor sobbing. Because I know exactly what it’s like to talk to an addict. Trying to reason with them telling them not to self destruct. Trying to guide them. We ALL HAVE DEMONS. We all don’t process and heal the same way as everyone else. You can sit there with your perfect life and pretend that it’s easy and that they should just “get over it” but you don’t know what they go through. You don’t know that they can have the world but the feeling of rejection as a child can carry on with them as an adult and destroy a person. The trauma as a child can destroy a person. Trauma is hard. Life is hard. Everything is hard but if you ask me what I’ll be doing in this situation I will tell you that I will fight to make a change. I will fight to help anyone who has ever gone through trauma and who has demons they can’t control. I will fight because you don’t just give up. He will get help, he will do it for his child. He will take the steps they he was afraid to take before because he was embarrassed or ashamed. I’m tired!!!!!!!! Of people judging people I am tired of feeling ashamed to share my story. I will not be ashamed. You choose to love someone who is “damaged” you take the weight of their past, their pain, their guilt. YOU MUST BE STRONG AND PATIENT. If you can’t handle that and can’t accept the dents and the cracks if you can get them to trust you, you will never find a better ally then that. Above all they are still here wondering if someone like you will ever love them. Take that chance don’t be afraid and never ever give up!!!!