Thank you for being here to support James through this unthinkable journey.
I am not sure where to begin…
This past week all I wanted to do was crawl in a hole and not speak to anyone.... I wanted to shut down. I wanted to disappear. At times I still do.
But every time I would look at Facebook I was reminded of all the love and support surrounding me. I felt your arms wrapped around us.
And yet, as much as you wanted real honest, raw updates I felt like I wanted to protect you. This is so incredibly painful; all I wanted to share was the good news. I’m a happy, positive, good news kind of girl. I didn’t let you fully in.
But it’s time to get real. While I’ll still maintain as positive outlook as I can, it’s time to open up and allow you to truly support us through this journey, the good, the bad and the ugly.
So, I will start with where we are now. His surgery went well; neurologically James is his awesome, loving, inquisitive self.
However, even with one of the best pediatric neurosurgeons in the world, he was not able to get it all.
We are clear that there are some “islands” left and that there will be after treatment (chemo, radiation, alternative, etc.) needed. This news brought me to my knees. I honestly didn’t know how to process this (I am still struggling), let alone, how do I post this on FB.
Now, we wait for the pathology results next week. The waiting is the worst. Once we have a name for it, once we know what kind of tumor it is, we can develop a game plan.
Until then….we wait. We wait at the hospital while he gets stronger and prepares to take this battle head on.
He is strong, he is powerful, he is love and he is unstoppable. He is James!!