This Cancer has been so hard for me and my family. I waited this 3 months to get the results yesterday and sadly they weren't what we were praying for. There is good and bad to every story mine is that the cancer is incurable and that's so hard for me to hear and if it's hard for me I can't imagine the pain My children are feeling. With that being said the struggle for me is real going for making really good money to getting only SSI all my bills just keep stacking up. I refuse to give up because I made a promise to my kids that no matter what I will not use drugs. I'm going to have 4 years clean on February 18th. Anyone that knows me knows my children and my animals are my pride and joy. So I will be starting radiation again one more time to see if they can get this one big spot that has gotten a lot bigger to go down and then again in April I will have another test a CT scan and if it doesn't work then the last option is chemo and just keeping me comfortable is what they said. I just wanted to update everyone there's another new spot from the test yesterday. Two of them did get a little smaller but with that came the new spot and then the other one that got much larger. The doctor said it will be very hard to radiate this one because it's by my esophagus in my lung and in order to do the test I have to be able to hold my breath for 30 seconds five times each time they radiate which they have to do eight more He did admit to me it's very hard for people that are claustrophobic which is me because I will have a tube in my mouth that I have to breathe through And I have asthma really bad now so it's hard for me to breathe as it is. So I'm doing breathing instructions and tell the radiation starts which they'll reach out to me here very shortly to get started again. I'm exhausted, emotional, and feel spent. Thank goodness for my beautiful close friend Jamie because I am now attend a church and I'm so grateful I feel close to God because without these things I don't know if I could go much longer. Warrior and survivor is what I feel right now why God chose me for this I don't know unless it's to help other people. If that's the case I'll just keep moving along. Thank you to everyone that has supported by money, prayers, or sharing the post. I'll attach my cash app as well $Beachgrrl143