First of all, I want to express that I am feeling extremely vulnerable about sharing my story and asking for financial support. But I strongly believe in and have witnessed the power of community in times of joy and sadness alike.

It feels extremely challenging to open up and let you in on what has happened.

There is shame. Feelings of having failed and missed the signs or not truly listened to my intuition. And still, after a few weeks now, this inner knowing of everything happens for a reason is slowly settling in. I feel like I can slowly make peace with the situation of being back where it all began.

However, there are costs that need to be covered to get me back on track and have my most personal belongings shipped to me.

A little background on my story:

I came to California in March 2020. A cascade of synchronicities had let me to move into the woods of West County in California to study Western Herbalism. An invitation to move even closer to source. It felt like a homecoming. I arrived only with a backpack - the bare minimum. The fireplace in my little yurt was everything to me - my hearth. Deeply immersing myself into the basics of being a human, tending to the land and learning about herbal medicine, astrology and ancient Ayurvedic practices has led me closer to myself and taught me all I ever had to remember.

From there, everything just blossomed into a journey of self-healing, finding purpose and community and offering my gifts back to those who were in need. I had found friends that felt like family, built myself a beautiful nest and started to deepen my practice as a bodyworker.

After three years of heeding the call to reawaken my gifts, a deep desire to go back to my motherland and reconnect with my family had let me to the decision to leave California for a month.

In May, I flew back to SF and was denied access because of visa issues. A total shock. I felt like I wanted to die. I was not able to go back to this life that I had worked for so hard and risked so much in the beginning. I am now blocked from entering the country for five years.

I am with my family now and in the process of reorienting, reevaluating, and piecing myself back together. It’s been a lot to process and integrate. Losing most of my possessions and my source of income, is adding onto the grief and overwhelm.

If you have known me during my time in California, please know that I am blessed to have crossed path with you and that you will be always remembered. Sweet memories we made will always stay with me in my heart.

May you all be blessed and know that I am so grateful for your support.

With a tender heart and appreciation,

Nina