Comfort&Care 4 Ron(pancreatic cancer)& Ladell at97

My name is Madison, and this sweet mother and son are my father and grandma. My grandmother, Ladell is a 97 year old widow to a WW2 veteran after over 70 years of loving marriage. Ron (my dad) is their only son. When my papaw passed away almost 5 years ago, my father put his life on hold to move in a care for her. Over the years she had trauma from watching friends suffer in nursing homes, so we promised we would never take her there. Recently she took a bad fall breaking 4 ribs, the time spent lying down to heal has wasted away her muscles leaving her almost entirely bed bound and now incontinent and experiencing bouts of complete delusion. My dad had been experiencing some pain and wasn’t able to give grandma the care she needed at the progressed state that is her new normal. Not everyone is able to provide intimate care for incontinent bed bound adults. It is a full time job. Of course I jumped in to help, and had my dad go to the er for his pain since it wasn’t improving.

unfortunately this led to a diagnosis of stage 4 pancreatic cancer that has metastasized into the liver, spreading cancer cells throughout the body. The worst possible news you could ever hear.

The doctor has given him 3-6 months without treatment and up to a year with treatment if his body is responsive to chemo. He is not eligible for any surgeries or radiation since he is so far progressed. He is terminal, and only God knows how long he has. This is devastating. I had to bury my Mother Lottie from the exact same cancer less than 5 years ago after a hard fought battle. It almost broke me watching her struggle and eventually succumb to this devastating disease. I worked to raise money for the Pancreatic Cancer Network in her name a couple of years and learned a lot. The likelihood of this rare cancer in both adults is astronomical, but it is the reality of the situation we have to accept with such little time to process. I thought I’d never have to see a loved one go through this again, much less my dad. The last five years have been horrible with pain and many losses in my family, it’s hard to believe this is happening again.

I have worked hard to build my business as a tattoo artist, and provide for my family. I have always taken care of myself, and my family. I have never been a person to take a handout, even if it was desperately needed. I just make it work and carry whatever is thrown my way. This situation however I need help. I have become the full time caregiver for both of them. Although my father is not yet incapacitated from his cancer, he can no longer work to provide, and everyday tasks are becoming harder and harder. My grandmother is completely dependent, and he unfortunately will be too in the coming months. Despite the traumatic way I have learned end of life and adult dependent care, I am blessed to have the experience and capability needed to care for them in the way they both deserve.

I am now unable to work, as they cannot be left unattended to. I don’t know when I’ll be able to return to work as this is an ongoing situation, and I’ve already been out a while. I had to move all my studio equipment into storage. Bills are piling up quick as I have two households, both mine and theirs. Chemo and medical expenses is only going to keep adding to that. Medicare will not provide diapers, wipes, chucks, creams, home nurses, or anything for my grandmother. I have exhausted every route which is why I am making this now. I know everyone in this world is struggling hard right now, so if you can’t give I completely understand. Prayer is also an amazing gift.

Making ends meet with no income is something I just don’t know how to navigate. We are accepting donations through here, as well as donations of gift cards to grocery stores, uber eats, instacart, DoorDash, ect. Anything helps. We are also accepting visits, calls and cards and kind words to cheer them up a bit. We need all the support we can get, in any form that we can get it. Feel free to reach out for the address. It’s so hard to maintain positivity when the future is so bleak. Thank you so much. I just want to take the burden and worry off them as much as possible. My dad gave his last years to care for her, and this is beyond unfair for him to be cut short. I want to give them the best and any comfort I can. Please continue to pray for us in this time of absolute brokenness.