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Please help my family get through a very difficult time...

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Hi, my name is Steph and I am trying to raise funds to help my family get through a very difficult time after a year of "whatever can go wrong, will". Go fund me is my last resort and I hope my message reaches people that can understand that sometimes we all need a little bit of help to keep going. Here's my story:

For over 15 years, I was a stay at home caregiver to my mom and stepfather as well as a single mom to one son. My parents both had serious health issues that required someone being there to provide live in help. My stepfather passed away a few years ago, and my mom, although now wheelchair bound, was doing well enough that I could work again, so that is what I did. I looked after our home, my mother, my son and held down a job. It was hard work, but I dearly loved my job and I adored my little family that I came home to every night.

Then one morning in late March of 2024, my mom found a lump. (My mom is the lovely lady on the left, I'm on the right. I did not include my son for his privacy.) The lump was aggressive. It got larger by the day and our worst fears were confirmed: it was cancer. Even before the official diagnosis of terminal lung cancer was given in mid April, it was very apparent to everyone that this was very, very bad. My mom went downhill so fast. She passed away on May 17, 2024 and her loss has left a gaping hole in our lives. She was our rock. She was our glue. She was more than a grandmother to my son, she was an extra mom too. My mom was an extraordinary person. One of the most caring and thoughtful people I have ever had the privilege of knowing. We were so lucky to have her with us for as long as we did and her loss has been absolutely devastating. Over the next 12 months, my son and I really struggled with our mental health. Both of us have been working through major depression, shock and grief. It has impacted our relationship as well, which was always a good one before, and losing that closeness between us made all of the emotional fallout of what we had been through even worse. Everything went so fast that we didn't seem to even have time to let the diagnosis sink in, let alone process our feelings of loss. When I went back to work last summer, my hours were lighter than before, and dwindled down after that until I was laid off just before Christmas. Being a little past middle age, and with a spotty resume due to being at home caring for family for so long, just getting an interview for a fast food job is proving to be nearly impossible.

Since that time, it has been one thing coming up after the other. Things like needing to replace a washing machine, having to give up my car because I can't afford to fix it, home repairs that need done that are becoming ever more urgent that I just cannot manage. And now I am facing the renewal of a loan I had to take out just to hang on to our home in the first place. I have managed to come up with a lot of it, but I need to come up with the last few thousand and I am out of options, hence this go fund me. This is the most humbling experience I can imagine - relying on the kindness of strangers. I feel so ashamed, but I also know that's silly because I have never judged anyone I've donated to in the past. It stands to reason that I shouldn't be passing judgement on myself but that's not the way feelings work. Still, if I didn't try this and lost my home, I would be even more ashamed in addition to being angry with myself for not even trying this, so here I am. It still is so utterly embarassing to admit that I am beyond the point where I can pull myself up by my bootstraps. I have been pulling so hard that I broke those straps clean off.

What this all boils down to is this: I do have light at the end of the tunnel, but that light won't reach me for a little while yet. I have tenants planning to move in in the fall, and one more coming in January which will help cover the monthly bills going forward. I continue to look for work as well as trying to start up a creative side hustle for myself. I know this is a temporary situation, but it is a dire one because I am at serious risk of losing the home my family has lived in for over 40 years. My family bought this place when I was in my teens, and my son has really known no other home at all as we moved back when he was very young. After everything that has happened, we just want stability. We are average people, that just want to live a simple life. We just want to stay here and not live in fear of everything collapsing for the next few months, until we can get back on our feet.

If you took the time to read this far, thank you. It has been really difficult to write this through intermittent tears and I hope I told my story clearly and I deeply appreciate anyone that has given of their time just to read this. So, I guess in conclusion, I just want to say that if you feel so inclined and can afford any small amount to contribute, My son and I would be so grateful. More grateful than words could ever express. My mother raised me to believe in paying it forward, and both my son and I have made that principle one of our core values. In the future, once we are past this crisis, we both plan to do exactly that, in any way we can. Thank you again for reading, and if you chose to help, my most sincere thanks, from every fiber of my being to yours, thank you.


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Donations (5)

  • Anonymous
    • $50
    • 22 d
  • Chuck Carvalho
    • $50
    • 22 d
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Organizer

Stephanie Orange
Organizer
Brampton, ON

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