Hey Y'all!

For those in a rush, here's the short version: I've been navigating my mental health issues for decades now, and have watched my depression become more and more aggressive over the course of the last couple of years. I have found an affordable tract for medication, and am asking for help in funding 12 weeks of intensive talk therapy. First, pray for me. Then, if you feel led, chip in a little. I appreciate you!

For those who want the long version: It is time for me to enter back into a season of therapy. This will be the third such season of my life. My first season was through my late teen years, the second was in my mid 20's, and now here I am in my mid 30's ready for round 3. I have suffered [formally diagnosed] with depression for some 20 years, and social anxiety for 10. My anxiety is fairly well managed, which is to say I have learned and have begun to master coping mechanisms and grounding exercises and self-talk improvements that I learned in my last therapy season. My depression, on the other hand, has gotten worse over the last couple of years.

When I talk about my depression, I describe it with two main categories; depth and duration. The depth is how sad/depressed/heavy/unmotivated I feel, while the duration is the length of time of the depression episode, as well as the time between episodes. As I understand it, it is rare to be in a depression event 24/7/365. Rather, it comes in waves. In keeping with that idea of waves, and the two descriptors; I have certainly had short 'waves' of depression that were more intense. There have been days in the last decade where I could not get out of bed, or off the floor. Thankfully, I have not had many of those days, and only a handful of them in the last couple of years. What I have been fighting recently is much longer duration of episode, the waves take longer to recede, if you will. Whats more, I have so few days of 'normal' between episodes these last few months.

With all of that considered, I have taken two big steps into confronting and managing my depression. I have, concurrently, lined up a talk therapist (who has come highly suggested) and have discussed anti-depressants with my family doctor. I am now on a 6-month stint of Wellbutrin, in hopes that it will maximize the effectiveness of the talk therapy. Thankfully, my state medicaid covers this medication.

It does not, however, cover talk therapy, especially not a Christian therapist. I am bent on having a Christian therapist, and I understand not all who read this will see that as important. I remain insistent on its importance. To that end, I am here to ask for your considerate assistance in funding this journey. With every discount I can muster, each session will cost $112 (which is exceedingly reasonable, truth be told). I am going to sit through 12 weeks of weekly sessions, which comes out to $1344 on the nose. And that language is intentional. I AM going to sit through this therapy, come what may. If this fundraising is a bust, I will sell things/pawn things/beg, borrow, ...but not steal... to get this done. This is the time to get this work done, I simply cannot manage the finances on my own.

If you have read this far, I appreciate the time spent here, even if nothing else comes of it; I thank you.

If you would like to give, understand that every dime of my initial goal will be spent on therapy.

If you would like to give, but are like me and cannot, do not walk away with any shame on your shoulders. The widow's mite was more valuable than the coin purse of the flagrant wealthy. The Lord knows the kindness of your heart, and the earnest nature of your prayers. I, too, envy those prayers.

And to everyone, please pray for this. Pray for money to show up, pray for my success against this malady of my brain, pray against the lingering hurt that has caused it, pray for my therapist.

Finally, consider sharing this fundraiser page around. There are a lot of us who struggle and have struggled with mental health issues, and the kindness of friends-of-friends and even strangers is welcome here. I thank you all. Lord bless you and keep you.