Paying Tribute to Pamela F.R.O.G

This fundraiser is to help my brother, Joseph La Roche, with the funeral costs for his wife, Pamela Dawn La Roche, who lost her battle with cancer and went into Eternal Life on August 21, 2022, at the young age of 51.

Pamela and Joe came to know each other about 6 years ago; they were the best years of their lives. They were married for five years. About two years ago, Pamela was diagnosed with cancer.

Joe and Pamela both had strong faith before meeting each other, but it was amplified with them together. To everyone that knows them, it is clear that God planned for them to meet each other. I had watched my brother struggle to make ends meet throughout his life, having a marriage and relationships where he wasn’t appreciated. Pamela had a very similar life before meeting Joe. Joe and Pamela were the blessing and breath of life they both needed.

On August 29th, we celebrated the life of Pamela and family and friends showed their love and support to Joseph and his family. As the day was ending, when almost everyone had left the cemetery, I was close to my brother as he was talking with the staff from the funeral home. They graciously told Joe that there was no rush for him to meet with them, to take a few days, and they could schedule some time for him to come in, and they could work with him and insurance. In this conversation, it sounded like there would not be other money from insurance; he would need to come up with the money and pay for everything himself. The funeral home was gracious and said they would work with him, and still, he just needs to take some time to be with his family, and they can talk in a few days.

In Joe’s voice, as he said he would need to pay for everything, I could tell this was going to be difficult. I hope we can help him with at least some of that struggle.

I am trying to raise $10,000 to help Joe with the funeral costs. This amount doesn’t cover the entire cost, but it would significantly help. Anything you can provide towards this goal will help not only Joe but also help his family of 4 children as they adjust their life to their new normal.

MORE ABOUT JOSEPH…

Joe is one of the hardest workers you will ever meet. He has always had blue-collar jobs to support his family, and throughout much of his life he has worked side jobs to help supplement his family’s funds to help meet their needs. But how Joe spent his time has never stopped with working for what he needed.

He is the guy who will help anyone around him with what they need. In my experience it practically wouldn’t matter what the need was, or if Joe had ever done that specific task before, or even how much sleep he would lose by helping. From my observations, if he could do it he would do all that he could to help someone in need.

Joe, many times, works long hours for his job. He has had many costs in his life, including the substantial costs of dealing with court costs from divorce and custody of his children, and these costs continue for him. He loves his four children so much and wants to continue to be a huge part of their lives.

While Pamela was sick, Joe needed to take substantial time off work, which I understand was not all paid time off. Taking care of Pamela and his family has been his priority, as shown through his actions.

He is currently 48 years old.

MORE ABOUT PAMELA…

Pamela was always smiling, in fact the smile was infectious to the people she was around. She couldn’t help but be positive. Her faith in God was very strong. Her love for Joe couldn’t have been more obvious.

I am not sure I could do better justice talking about Pamela than her close friend Julie did in her eulogy. I am providing some of that below to help you understand who she was and the impact she had on the people around her and her community.

“Truly, I say to you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of Heaven. Therefore, whoever takes the lowly position of this child is the greatest in the kingdom of Heaven, and whoever welcomes one such as this child in my name, welcomes me.”

Jesus himself told us exactly how to get into Heaven in Mathew:18.

For those of you who knew Pam well, you know that she truly had the heart and faith of a child.

My name is Julie and I have been a friend of Pam’s for the last 25 years of her 51 years here on this earth.

I met Pam at St Anthony Parish in Menomonee Falls where her two sons and my two sons attended grade school. They all were active in the Boy Scouts and Pam was a Cub Scout Den Leader for some time for both of my boys.

Born April 3, 1971 in Germantown to Philip and Dianna Goodrich, Pamela Dawn also had an older brother, Danny, whom she only ever spoke of to me with praise. She loved her family immensely.

Pam has always had the energy of a child. That big smile would radiate with an energy of welcoming every time she was approached.

In her youth, she loved figure skating, musicals, plays, singing in a choir with her Dad and playing piano with her Mom.

Pam had an energy and a goofiness in her story telling that persisted until the end. As we thought in July that she was near the end and were visiting her in the hospital with Joseph (Husband), her Dad and Stepmom, friends, Adam & Sarah, we were reminiscing about her plays she would write. We thought she was so sedated that she was unaware, all of a sudden she sits up straight and says “Hello, I’m Ralph the firehouse dog” and proceeds to tell this crazy hand puppet story in which Miss Piggy ends up playing with matches and cooking out bratwursts. Wish I had that one on video and many others.

Pam was gentile and rugged at the same time. An avid camper, biker and cook. Life handed Pam a lot of hard knocks, but she carried on in the spirit of love. Her own Mom, Dianna, died at the age of only 48 from cancer. Pam was with her until the end and shared how much she knows her Mom is in Heaven, and she will be with her someday. Pam had a very hard divorce and she struggled financially just to stay afloat for many years as a single Mom. She started her own business called ‘Pamela’s Pie, Cookies & Cakes by Design.” She was a favorite at the local farmer’s market. Her pies were my favorite.

Pam planned and served the grade school lunch program @ St. Anthony’s. She worked for the county Senior Center and then she worked as the “Activity Director” for several local assisted living facilities in the Falls. She knew just about everyone and was loved and respected by a lot of senior citizens. Everywhere we went in the Falls, she knew someone.

Neither Pam or I wanted to do the Holiday meal cooking and clean up alone, so our families combined the Holiday meals for Thanksgiving, Christmas, or Easter for quite a few years. It was always a blast.

She was our No. 1 volunteer when Eileen and I would hold the stage build night for the schools plays and Christmas shows.

When things were really rough, she and I would sneak away to the swimming pool at the Holiday Inn. We would say it was for exercise and that the $5 fee was less than a gym membership, but really we just wanted to sit in the hot tub and chat with each other for two hours.

Pam was so lonely as a single Mom, but she worked hard and just wanted the best for her kids. She loved them more than life.

She had a hard time finding that quality person that shared her love of God and life. She prayed for years that she would find him.

Although late in this play of Pam’s life, Joseph enters on left stage and both of them felt as though they met their “Happy Ever After.” Things were not going to be easy, but this rag tag group would work together to build a family together. Although given just 5 years of marriage, they made the best of them and the happiness was felt by all persons around them. Many people never find that kind of love and they both knew it. Even after 5 years of marriage, they still looked and spoke to each other like newlyweds. Joseph, even though God had to take her after just 5 years, she literally gave to you, her very last breath.

Pam had a way of making others feel appreciated and worthwhile. She would write goofy plays and musicals with each of the assisted living residents in mind as she wrote them. They were just the light hearted and goofy productions needed for the families of these senior citizens. If any of you were around for her rendition of the Princess and the Frog story, you know exactly what I mean. Heck, don’t forget one of her favorite musicals was the ‘Muppet Musical.’

Over the last 5 years, Pam, Joseph, Nancy and I would go and see plays and performances downtown at the Rep. It was our night out and always interesting.

Pam would do this thing for the Senior Residents where she would hold a “get to know them” event and invite their families and make up a bulletin board in their honor. She would invite the other residents to hear her ask them to share the story of their own lives. Pam loved this more than anyone. She would exclaim how you just never knew that the person over there was a Medal of Honor recipient or that other person was a successful musician or an inventor.

Pam’s faith was simple, like that of a child. It was as easy as “Loving God with your whole heart, whole mind and soul” and then just letting your life’s actions reflect that love. She did not live for herself and she prayed constantly for those that she loves.

Pam never held grudges, even when the things done to her were very hurtful. I’m certain that if anything was left unsaid before Pam left us, she would say “Forget it and listen to the FROG!” meaning “Fully Rely on God.” This is because, that’s the way she lived her life. As a totally dependent and helpless child of God. She has now given everything: all pain, worry and suffering to Him and is comfortably resting in His arms.