Our Dog Ate So Much Grass He Might Die

Our dog Pedge has a stomach so full of grass it might kill him. He was feeling kind of sick and he just ate such a huge amount of grass that he’s now completely fucked. The vet has to cut him open and take out the grass or Pedge will die.

We think he was chewing some burrs caught in his tail fur and accidentally swallowed one. He was kind of dry heaving so we let him out into the yard. Once he was out there he went nuts eating grass, apparently deciding that he needed to consume a fatal amount.

Now the grass is all wadded up in his stomach. He can’t eat or drink anything at all. If the vet doesn’t operate on him, he’ll never eat or drink anything again.

In order to pay for Pedge’s surgery, we will have to spend all the money we saved for our new baby. That’s right: Our dog ate so much grass he might die, and also in two weeks we are having a baby.

We’re both self-employed. Cate (Mom) is taking off time to recover from having a new baby and also to care for said baby. Bryce (Dad) is taking some time off too, in order to support Cate and also look after our daughter Briar, who is three years old. Our savings were supposed to cover living expenses during this period of negative cash flow.

Even without a new kid on the way, money is tight. We’ve cut a lot of luxury items out of our household budget this year, but Pedge is not a luxury item. He’s our constant companion and our daughter’s best buddy. When she was still small and learning people’s names, after she learned “Mom” and “Dad”, she learned “Pedge.” She loves him. We think he probably loves her.

Maybe you’re thinking, “Fools! Didn’t you know that you must carefully monitor your dog’s grass intake, in case he eats so much grass he dies?”

To which we respond, No. No we did not.

Even if you think we’re foolish for allowing Pedge to eat so much grass that he might die, we hope you will at least take pity on Pedge, who really did nothing to deserve this. And our daughter, who would be heartbroken to lose him.

About Pedge: Beautiful prince. Five years old. Loves to chase his ball. Probably loves our kid. Definitely loves Darlin’, our gentlest cat and Pedge’s best friend. Ate so much grass he might die.

Sincerely,

Cate, Bryce, Briar, and New Kid (name TBA)