Our 2024 Struggles

Hi all, this is how our 2024 is shaping up. We would have never thought we would be in this dire situation. We are Adam and Jen, and this is our reality currently.

We found out we were 4 weeks pregnant, 15 months after starting to try again. This was after being ready to try again 6 months post suffering a miscarriage.

We were over the moon. We weren’t sure if it would ever happen again, but were so excited at the thought of bringing home another baby.

About a week and a half after finding out, Jen started bleeding. It was a shock and an unwelcome reminder of the miscarriage almost two years prior. Jen was at work that morning, so had to leave to go to the hospital. After being there for a while, tests were run and an ultrasound was booked for the next week to see how the baby was going as at 5 weeks, it was too early to really see anything.

A few days later, the bleeding started up again when Jen was at work. We went back to the hospital and tests were run again. This time, an ultrasound was done, as the baby was 6 weeks so the doctors were hopeful they could see something. The baby was found, but had a slow heart rate. We were told that it would most likely end in a miscarriage, though there was no guarantee on this. We were told to come back for the follow up ultrasound we had initially booked.

A week or so later, we had the ultrasound. We were told the baby’s heart rate had picked up and the baby was looking strong. They did however pick up that Jen had a haematoma and possibly an odd shaped uterus and the baby was close to the previous c-section scar. This prompted the Warwick hospital to refer us to the Mater Mothers Hospital in Brisbane, as they do not have the facilities to care for such a rare case.

So by 8 or 9 weeks, we had a scan at the Mater, where the doctor told us that the baby’s gestational sac was implanted on the c-section scar. We were told that we would have to wait till the 12 week scan, to see if the baby would move further into the uterus, for the pregnancy to be able to continue. We would also have to keep an eye on where the placenta would implant.

That scan happened at 13 weeks. The haematoma was gone and the baby had moved into the uterus well. Heart rate was strong and so was bub. But the placenta was starting to look like it would be a complication. The doctor told us that Jen was looking like she would have a placenta accreta and possibly previa. And if this was the case, we would be delivering a baby at 36 weeks via caesarean hysterectomy. Jen was now classified under a high risk pregnancy.

Two or three weeks went by and signs of bleeding had slowly eased and then gone.

At 16 weeks, Jen was at work when she started to bleed again. We took another trip to Warwick hospital, where a bedside ultrasound and a formal one were conducted to ensure the baby was ok. We were told to go home and keep an eye on the bleeding, and come back if it got worse. Two days later, after bleeding seemed to be increasing, Jen was at work crying when she was told to go back to the hospital, if only for some peace of mind. After 4 hours there, they had called Mater for advice, and they had requested we make the trip to Brisbane so that they could access everything themselves.

An exam was done when we arrived to look for the source of bleeding, and an ultrasound was booked for the next day. This meant a night of being admitted into hospital. Jen stayed overnight, while Adam went and stayed with his family for the night so he could come back in the morning.

The next day, we had the ultrasound. And the conditions were confirmed. Placenta accreta and previa. Meaning the placenta was implanted on the C-section scar and partially covering the cervix. Not only did this confirm the birth plan we spoke about, but the doctor advised that bleeding is part of the condition and something we would have to deal with. But because of this, they would definitely want me nearby earlier than when due to give birth. Jen stayed in hospital again awaiting word from the obstetrics doctors the next day. Adam went back to his family to return again in the morning.

The next day, the doctors made their decision and did their rounds informing Jen that they would be keeping her in hospital until accommodation could be sorted out, to stay until the baby is born. A little while later, Adam returned, this time to say goodbye and head back to Warwick to be with our kids who had stayed with their grandparents the last two nights.

He then returned to the Mater on Saturday with the kids so that they and Jen could see each other, as it would be nearly 5 months until we can all be together permanently again.

The trip alone from Warwick to Brisbane had already cost us $100 just in parking over the four times Adam had to park the car. This and four days off work each that week, without any leave left, left us worried for the pay that we would get the next week, and how we would pay the bills.

We had already been struggling but the hit of the week without work, and the reality that Jen’s income would now no longer exist, made it much harder.

It’s now been 2 and a half weeks since Jen was first admitted to hospital. She is now in accommodation for the rest of her pregnancy, which is at this point, until July 2024. Adam is back in Warwick and so are the kids just so they can keep going to work and school. The time apart is agonizing.

We are struggling big time. We are supposed to be moving house next month, as we are at the end of our lease. However we can’t currently apply for houses as we have only one income that isn’t going to cover the rental payments alone. Our bills are piling up. We have put holds on some accounts that we could, but there are some things we cannot delay. Our electricity bill already had a payment plan in place, that we haven’t even been able to continue. We are currently living on one income as we are awaiting paperwork to send into Centrelink for payments to commence for Jen. Adam had to have time off work as he was sick with an infection that the doctors say was likely caused by stress. Our income will be halved again due to the time off and now we cannot cover our rent for a week, let alone putting food on the table for both Adam and the kids back home, and Jen in Brisbane. We are hopeful for weekend visits constantly, and trips in for Adam to join in on appointments but even that is uncertain, due to being short on money for petrol.

We just don’t know what else we can do at this point.

If you made it this far, thank you for taking the time to read this.