Zoli and I were married in 2013 and shortly after we started to try for a family. After two natural pregnancies, two miscarriages, and genetic testing that couldn't explain the reason for miscarriage, we were referred to reproductive endocrinology at Kaiser. Through the reproductive endocrinology office in San Francisco, we met some amazing nurses and doctors who walked us through the processes we would be participating in over the next year. At that time I had infertility insurance through work that would pay 50% of this process. IVF is not covered by insurance.
After several failed rounds of Intra-Uteral Insemination (IUI) using two different types of hormone therapy, which 50% was covered by Kaiser Insurance, we were no closer to pregnancy. Thank God for an amazing job and co-workers that were flexible with us through this process for my weekly and sometimes daily drives to SF. Their support when I would suddenly break out in unexplainable tears and when I felt I could not hormonally take anymore was what got me through that part of our difficult journey.
Last September (2016), our doctor advised that it was in our best interest financially and physically to stop IUI and begin the process of IVF. Because Kaiser did not pay for this, he recommended we find a doctor outside of Kaiser. At this point, Zoli and I decided to take a break. We felt that our lives and marriage had been turned upside down and we needed to feel more normal again. Additionally, we just did not know how we would pay for the expenses associated with IVF.
As we are both another year older, Zoli and I recently have decided we have the strength together to pick up where we left off in starting our family. With the suggestions of friends, we recently found ourselves visiting Marin Fertility. Although we haven't started the actual procedure of IVF, we know one round will cost us a little over $16,000 and each round after (if necessary) will cost more. There is no guarantee in this and it is incredibly scary to take this risk.
For those who know me, you know the thought of not having children is devastating. So in weighing our options, not trying IVF is not an option. It is difficult to ask a community for money to help us with our family when I know each person has a financial struggle of their own. It takes a village to have children and to raise them. In this case, we need extra help from our village. If you feel inclined to give, it would mean the world to us, whatever that might be. If financial giving is not an option, please share some prayers with us. Know that we need them and feel they are just as important.
If anything, as you read this, I hope maybe you realize how many couples struggle with infertility. It's not an easy journey. To find joy for friends who are able to start their families without difficulty, to answer the question, "When are you going to have babies?" from the person who doesn't know differently without breaking down emotionally, and to hold a baby and wish so badly that one day you could be holding your own child... these things are a daily struggle and it is so difficult to not lose hope. When Zoli and I do hold our child for the first time, I know this struggle will be worth everything we have gone through. As we start the hardest leg of this journey, we appreciate your support and love and know that we truly could not do this without our community, our village
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