Burns Family

(From Amber, their daughter)
If you know Marg and Rolie, then you know what kind and good natured folk they are. My parents are some of the most easy-going, simple to please people I know. Unfortunately, they have fallen on some hard(er) times as of late and could really use some support. My dad grew up in and around Waupaca and I am fairly positive he knew just about everyone from central Wisconsin. And he would tell you about it. With detail. That’s to say, my dad was a talker and loved to chat with everyone and anyone about everything and anything. We loved this about him, although sometimes it did make running errands with him a bit difficult. As a painter, his work also allowed him to expand his network and mingle often, which is why he liked it so much. My dad was a self-employed painter for basically his entire life, and definitely mine. This allotted him the freedom, flexibility, and control that he greatly enjoyed, but it also came with some downsides. Financial instability has been one of them. Since my mom has also not worked full time for the past 30 years due to various past injuries that left her medically unable to, my parents sustained a family of five, and now themselves, on primarily my dad’s income. Depending on the weather, people’s desire for new paint, his sons’ ability or desire to help him, or his marketing skills, Rolie’s livelihood was never what I would call comfortable. Although, he would tell you differently, of course. Another admirable aspect both of my parents have is their humility and resourcefulness. No matter how difficult things have gotten in the past, they always figured something out. My dad was very prideful, sometimes detrimentally so. He did not like to ask for help, even if deep down he knew he needed it. Often this led to unnecessary hardships for them. Whether running into physical or financial ailments, my parents tried to do it on their own. As they approached retirement age, my brother Josh and I couldn’t help but wonder how things would work out in their favor. My dad continued to work full time to ensure they got their needs met. And when retirement was brought up, he scoffed, saying that he still had some good years left in him. This stubborn drive kept him afloat, and mostly happy, for a long, long time. But, we all know that when someone is down on their luck, things tend to spiral quickly. Fast forward to present day. We are still mourning the sudden loss of my brother Eric in May 2021. The outpouring of love and support we received then was very heartfelt and made this awful time a bit more bearable. Somehow, we became even closer through that tragedy. Now, the past few months my dad was also laid up and unable to work because of back and sciatic pain. Our family pleas for him to see a doctor fell short, of course, because the medical system has not been kind to my uninsured family in the past. He sought alternative avenues such as acupuncture and chiropractic treatment, which we were indeed grateful for, since normally he would claim that a good night’s sleep and some gardening was all he needed. However, even these supports were to no avail since things were much worse than any of us could have expected. As of two weeks ago, we found out that my dad had what appears to be very progressive stage IV lung cancer, but was still waiting to undergo some more screenings for exact diagnosis. This was devastating to all of us, but especially to my mom. As they approach their 47th wedding anniversary later this month, I cannot imagine what she must be going through. The grief, sadness, fear, etc. is undoubtedly overwhelming, but you wouldn’t know it talking to her. Since we found out, my mom hardly left my dad’s side and took on the role of nurse, ignoring her own aches, pains and needs. It’s easy to see the deep-seeded love between them when things get hard. I am saddened to have to write this, but my dad passed away while in the hospital, August 9, 2023. He was surrounded by loved ones and we are thankful that his painful journey was at least brief. He told me on the phone the other day that he always felt grateful his mom did not suffer much at the end of her life, and I now feel the same about him. My mom is doing her best to stay strong and manage the whirlwind that just blew through her, but she needs support now more than ever. She and my dad have been together since she was 17, and now she will have to learn how to live without him. Now is where I write my plea to you. My mom needs help. Despite the tighter spot the loss of income over the past few months has put them in, they have needed support for some significant and necessary home repairs for some time. Now she will be faced with large medical bills to boot. My parents enjoyed living simply, but my mom will now need support in order to just resume the basic standards of living. We are reaching out now to try to lighten the load my family faces as we try to begin to adjust to yet another new normal. Thank you for considering my family in this time of need. I love you dad, rest easy.  -Amber

https://waupacanow.com/2023/08/14/burns-roland-david/